I love blogging! I haven’t been doing that much in the past few years and I have always rationalized that it is due to the lack of time or ideas to talk about. But suddenly, this week, a fresh new energy popped up, and I found myself blogging, almost every day. And today is my second blog post too!
And I just realized that it is the act of blogging itself that I really enjoy. It is the act of talking to myself, and putting my thoughts into words. Yes, I can see now that contrary to what I partially used to think:
- I no longer blog to change the world. I have my novels for that.
- I don’t blog to get good traffic and exposure. I used to care about this 13 years back when I started blogging. Not anymore.
- I don’t blog to start heated discussions. I used to enjoy this a lot, but not sure I do anymore.
- I don’t want to be a fashionista or Instagram influencer. I am a blogger and will stay a blogger (slash novelist :P).
I blog because it feels good and I enjoy it. I blog because it is a learning tool, a creative act and a creation platform. It is like meditation to me. Listening to my internal voice, my honest self, brining it up and shaping it into written words.
I simply love it!
Freud hit me again last night. I was thinking of 3 different issues in the past couple of
days related to my study and work. One is about Death and Utopia, the second is about the transition from the big storyline to the sub Utopian storyline in the novel I am working on now, and the last is the two pages creative work I have to submit to my psychoanalysis class next Friday.
Before I went to bed, I had no clue, my conscious was blank, with no idea of what I am going to do with these 3 matters. I guess, the level of tension in my unconscious was high. It seized the chance of the night, the absentee of the ego. It woke me up, as if the little gene in the back of my head had all of the solution and wanted to spell it out. I wasn’t aware of that, and with a soar throat and tiresome, all I wanted was to sleep again. But the little gene whispered his wisdom in my ears, the solution for all the three:
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Queen Noor congratulating me on Twitter
Today is one of the good days, or lets say the special ones. Not just because I crossed the 100,000 follower mark on twitter and was humbled by a congratulations (Alf Mabrook) and a “follow” from Her Majesty Queen Noor, but also because I received the official confirmation of a 12 years old dream.
This afternoon the final award letter of Chevening Scholarship hit my inbox. It has been 12 years since I first applied for this scholarship when I graduated from the University of Jordan in the year 2000. Since then I have applied for around 6-7 times (once every two years). Last time was 3 years ago where I was told that I ranked 16th in Jordan, pending on the waiting list for they were going to reward only 9. This year, I made it into the 9 list of fortunate Jordanians.
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I have been pretty disciplined lately. I go to work, do my job, arrive on time and leave on time. I go to gym after work and then usually home. At home, and after a long day, I regularly make time to read or draw, or even write. Recently, I have also started attending an acting class at the royal film commission for twice a week 6-9 after work and for 6 months. It is a pretty full schedule, one that I enjoy, although I would prefer to have less conventional working hours and more time for my other productive hobbies.
Couple that busy disciplined schedule with a healthy diet. I have been doing pretty well on that side too. I have been health conscience for sometime now but never been successful at reducing my waste size as in recently, when I discovered the harm bread actually inflict on my body. In the past few year, I reduced my sugar intake. Gradually, I started reducing the number of spoons of sugar I add to my daily tea and coffee cups, and eventually I learnt to drink it without sugar. With time, habits becomes norms, and now, I don’t even like the taste of sugar in a tea or coffee cup. In the same way, I have stopped my smoking the shishah habit, which accompanied me for 10 years, and where at the height of it, I used to do it on a daily basis, sometimes even twice a day! Now I have been a non-smoker for 4 years. It hasn’t been easy at the beginning, but slowly I cut it off, and eventually my body started to repulse it. In the same way, I have cut on junk food. Junk food that at one point, few years ago, I used to have it almost on a daily basis, and in which my body fat reached to 25% while doing my regularly sports!
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