A letter from a woman who found out her husband is gay


I have been receiving some overwhelming messages on Facebook from people touched by the stories of the characters of my novel 3aroos Amman. Many have been thanking me for how much the book expressed their emotions. Many have identified themselves in the characters and read their own stories in these story lines.  When I wrote the book, I wanted to be a real reflection of the state of society around me. It highlights the issues from a feminist perspective. I am glad that it is reaching to people and giving them different kinds of emotions. For me, this is enough, this is rewarding, to just know that many people who felt isolated, alone, in dispair, would know that they are not alone, and that many others have gone through the same.

Here is a letter from a woman who identified with two characters, Laila & Salma. It contains some spoiler, but a very touching message that I wanted to share with you after taking her permission. She sent it from a fake profile on Facebook under the name Jane. My heart is with you Jane.

I really adored the novel for a special reason which is that I am Layla & Salma..Am a 29 year old girl who got divorced after 2 months of marriage to a gay husband and about a long period of engagement.

This experience changed my life upside down, made me lose all my dreams and made it so hard for me to trust any person in the whole world. I had a problem for some time with my beliefs and morals. Am religious, so conservative in my life..used to love everyone and help everyone in need. Am no longer the same, though I can say am somehow back on track.

This man that I married used to make me feel that am a queen, I really used to feel that he loved me and I loved him deeply. The only thing I asked from him is to make me feel safe. During the engagement, sometimes I felt that something is wrong but I always gave excuses.

One time during the engagement, I saw by accident a gay site on his laptop. I was shocked, but immediately refused any thought as he is religious and respectable and would never do anything like this.

Anyways, we didn’t consummate our marriage until a long time after the wedding day and with the help of Viagra.
I always felt that he didn’t want me and any act of affection would be out of duty. Not once did I feel that he loved being around me, just like layla used to say. I always felt something is wrong. Until one day I saw a msg from him to a guy with very inappropriate words. I didn’t say a word. We used to fight a lot on silly things. He loved being out of the house.A week later, he told me that he wanted divorce because we are not getting along.

I confronted him and he admitted. I gave him a chance that if he stops I will stand by his side and help him to quit. I visited many psychiatrists. He refused at first then accepted , I guess because he was afraid from my family and his. Anyways it is a long story and I gave many chances and he let me down , not once I felt that he wanted me at his house. And my biggest shock was when I knew that his family knew about him and made him go through with the marriage.

Anyways, I loved the story because I saw all the emotions and feelings that I felt before in Layla, expressed in an amazing way. If I wrote my story, it wont be as expressive of the truth as yours. I couldn’t help but cry with each line, cause it brought back lots of memories and emotions.

But I don’t agree with the ending. I know that layla chose this ending because of the society but how can she be friends with him? How can she accept knowing that he goes to have sex with guys? What husband would ask his wife to sleep with other men if she wants? Is this marriage? What happened to all the sacred feelings and commitments of marriage? What will happen to her son when he discovers his father is gay?

Let me tell you that living with a gay husband, is not a problem because of lack of sex only. This is a minor part and many would live without it.I used to think that he is impotent and that wasn’t a problem for me at all. But the problem is these men can’t live with a woman. Fights would be the title of their marriage because they always feel that they cannot live this world.it is not theirs.

Why would I pity him ? he knew about himself all the time and dragged me to this hell. When God created marriage, He did it between man and woman to complete and satisfy each other which is not the case in gay straight marriage. I don’t agree with your ending cause I feel it is filled with ظلم. And I don’t think that it is applicable, it is not marriage. The deceipt , lies and betrayal cannot make 2 people live with each other happily, and friendship is something else than marriage.

I really thank you for writing this amazing novel and for showing all these emotions. I can say am Salma now, cause am about to be thirty , am dying to have kids, but I will never be able to have one because of my age and being divorced. When I read what you wrote about salma talking about her imaginary daughter I cried, because I was saying these exact words to my friend few days earlier. Now I have no option except doing volunteer work with orphans. I wish we can adopt but as you said it is not acceptable.

So thank you for talking to me through the novel, and for making me feel that someone understands what am going through. I wish that gay guys would never marry, cause they would be literally killing the girls..7aram..

Sorry for the long letter but you gave me a chance to express myself because I cant do this. Cause I cant tell people about him and my feelings , and even if I do they won’t understand.

I will never forgive him for ripping my life.

84 thoughts on “A letter from a woman who found out her husband is gay

  1. I am with Jane, no one has the right to do that to a woman. And hope her statement will reach many “I wish that gay guys would never marry, cause they would be literally killing the girls..7aram..”
    It is simply not fare to destroy someones life

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  2. Marriage is usually considered a human right. It is not fair to destroy anyone’s life, and I have to agree that marriage between a homosexual person and a heterosexual is at some level abusive. [Why is marriage between a straight man and a gay woman being ignored?]

    But I guess any reasonable person would think that the best way to avoid the tragedy of such marriages to happen is by legalizing gay marriage. Denying gay marriage is destructive to homosexuals, so saying “I wish that gay guys would never marry” and “It is simply not fare to destroy someones life” is such a contradiction.

    To solve this particular problem we (as people) need to overcome the irrational fear of gay marriages.

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  3. Jane said: “I will never forgive him for ripping my life.”…

    Forgiveness is a difficult task… And it involves a lot more than saying the words “I forgive you”. However, every person goes through difficult times and this forces their hand to do things that they might not be proud of. It is known that society does not give women room to discover life and learn from their mistakes. Divorce is looked upon with such great stigma. Homosexuality has many stigmas associated with it as well.

    The way I see it, Jane and her gay husband were both victims of an unforgiving society. But society is made up of individuals. So, I think that this unforgiving attitude of Jane is part of her problem. If she cannot forgive others who are being oppressed, how does she ask society to be more forgiving of her frowned upon social status.

    We need radical reviews to how we deal with life’s problems, and make those types of experiences just that. A life experience that people go through, learn a lesson or two and then move on. Not holding grudges against one another, and consuming our life with spite and lack of forgiveness. And certainly not life destructing experiences.

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  4. SoKa says:

    This story is extremely saddening, as well as monumental in that it’s been shared on a public platform, where many stories like it never were before. Coming from an Asian Muslim background I totally understand what stigma is attached to both homosexuality, as well as a divorce. But in all of this the blame rests with the guy and his family because they still pushed for his marriage and went through with ruining a perfectly girl’s life. Jane should now lead by example and live her life to inspire others even more. If she wants to remarry- she should by whatever means she has at her disposal! If she wants a child- she should adopt! It might just be the case that she’s the first one in her society to change ‘the way things are done’ and thus has a trickle down effect on future generations of girls to come that will help prevent any of them going down the path she suffered.

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  5. Anonymous says:

    That’s a sad real story ,that is happening now and here may be in so many houses ,but not all of them ion the same situations found a way to talk about it , jane can not have ampathy towards her husband now !!!,only if she succeeds in forgiving ,him
    And if she does ,that could be the begining of a new life ,peacefull and serene
    At the end we ‘re just readers ,observers we “re not JANE

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  6. I feel sad for both Jane and her husband. As it was said in previous comments – they are both victims of an unforgiving society.

    Love cannot and should not be controlled. In my perspective there should be room for all types of love in this world. Gay, straight or whatever. As long as you do not hurt anyone else in the process – physically or emotionally.

    In this story the husband and his family deliberately hurt the young woman – this is hard to forgive. But if you remind yourself of the pressure that also falls on them – then maybe you will be able to find forgiveness in your heart.

    And your life is yours. If you want love and children – then you can still have it. Maybe you will not have it the way you initially planned it, but you can have it none the less!

    Best of luck to the both of them…

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  7. hi all, and thank u Fadi for posting my story. I would like to thank all of u for taking some time to read and comment on the story. My reason for sharing is to show that these stories do happen in our society and to show what feelings result from these situations.
    For those who blame me for not being able to forgive him, I would say, would you forgive someone who deliberately hurt your sister or mother or daughter? they might have reasons but would u?
    my ex was not pressured to get married, he was 27 when we got engaged, not very well settled at his job. so he wasnt in a position to get married. We had been friends at university for 5 years.Am sure he had some feelings for me, that is whhy he got married but was he able to be responsible and respect the marriage he was entering? NO..another reason for marrying me was that am good at keeping secrets and am from a good family and have a good job, so it is agood deal. I loved him with all my heart and passion, even when I knew i tried to offer help and respected his secret untill he stabbed me in the back again..
    Let me tell u that my honeyomoon was the worst period ever, cause he couldnt treat me like a bride.I cried daily because I didnt know what is wrong.. I thought he didnt like my body. can u imagine how hurtful this was????? and later we entered the zone of anger where i think he felt guilty everytime he saw me, and tried to avoid me. He didnt try to stop his acts for 1 week which is the honeymoon..
    So forgive him for what? for ruining my father? he treated him like a dear son.. my whole family were shocked and depressed for all what happened..do they deserve this?
    it is not my problem how he felt, i could feel with him if I was his friend..but not his wife!!!
    the way he treated me at the end was awful also, so how can I forgive him..

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  8. Thanks Jane for sharing. My reply was not really directed at you personally, as much it is a general point… Just something to consider. Obviously, we don’t have the full story to make a sound judgement of whether someone is worthy of forgiveness or not.

    However, my point was that people generally see how things affected their life without taking into consideration what others were going through. It seems to me that you did put an honest effort to make things work, while your husband was being negligent and opportunistic.

    On the critical side, -and I am only mentioning this for future reference not to throw blame or anything of the like-, I am surprised by two things. First, the picture you painted of this guy before marriage seemed favorable. You mentioned deeply loving this person and you even say he made you feel like a queen. And then all of a sudden this same person is being painted as a mean inconsiderate person. It really shocks me how such a transformation of character can happen. It either means that something drastically changed after marriage, or that you did not know each other well-enough to justify marriage. [Actually, this is a big flaw in our society and traditional marriage. I actually believe that people should live a full life together before marriage (including sex). This is a major flaw that makes it easy for people to become partners with people who are completely incompatible.]

    The other point is that you neglected some major cues. Like for example the gay porn. I guess this is a lesson to everyone to not ignore any detail when making major decisions like marriage. This does not justify the deceit that your husband engaged in, but it is important to take responsibility in your choice of life partners.

    Finally, as I mentioned earlier, I hope this can become an experience that you would later be able to tell as a tale without much pain.

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  9. Suleiman says:

    Dear Jane,

    These are my thoughts on your message (thoughts that I’ve built from the people around me & what they went through, stories I heard and facts that has been giving in 3aroos Amman), but first, Thank you for being so brave to share with us your story and we all respect you hiding your identity.

    “This experience changed my life upside down, made me lose all my dreams and made it so hard for me to trust any person in the whole world.”

    I know it is harder doing it than reading it, but never lose hope in Life, Life is beautiful, we are going through it once so why not to get the best out of it, it is not an obstacle free ride though, we go through so many experiences that we should learn a lesson from, each one goes with their own struggle in order to figure out how to get over it and be stronger for the path to come, so, please never give up hope nor dreams.

    “This man that I married used to make me feel that am a queen, I really used to feel that he loved me and I loved him deeply. The only thing I asked from him is to make me feel safe.”

    Be sure that he loved you, but unfortunately not the way you wanted it, he made you feel like a queen because you meant a lot to him, am sure he tried his best to make you feel safe, but he failed!

    “I gave him a chance that if he stops I will stand by his side and help him to quit.”

    It is not a matter of quitting a habit, human sexuality is something that is built in their DNA system, it is not like smoking, one day a person wants to smoke and the next they decide to quit!

    “And my biggest shock was when I knew that his family knew about him and made him go through with the marriage.”

    That’s the problem here in our society, they might know or THINK they know what it is all about, yet they want to see the “perfect image” an image that is in their minds set in stone that way, they wanted to see their son married with a wife and kids yet smashing their son’s idea of a happy life just for them to be happy, they don’t understand that it is not their life, they had their’s the way they want, let others live it the way they want, without hurting anybody else just because you want to see such an “image”

    “But I don’t agree with the ending. I know that layla chose this ending because of the society but how can she be friends with him? How can she accept knowing that he goes to have sex with guys? What husband would ask his wife to sleep with other men if she wants? Is this marriage? What happened to all the sacred feelings and commitments of marriage? What will happen to her son when he discovers his father is gay?”

    It wasn’t a proper marriage in the first place, it was a forced marriage, an image of a perfect life, just because his mother wanted to see her grandchild, he didn’t want to go with it, at some point he felt bad for ruining Layla’s life but he couldn’t help it, he thought he’ll be up to this difficult situation in his life. he wanted her to be happy, so for me he set her free between both of them, but to the society, they are together, again, it is all about this “image” people want to see, they gave them what they wanted to see, but in their own private life it was a total opposite!

    “But the problem is these men can’t live with a woman. Fights would be the title of their marriage because they always feel that they cannot live this world.it is not theirs.”

    As you said, it is not their’s, they are forced into such a lifestyle that is not there, imagine yourself a size 5 and trying to fit in a size 1 !!!

    “Why would I pity him ? he knew about himself all the time and dragged me to this hell.”

    He was forced into dragging you the same way he was forced to drag himself!

    “I wish we can adopt but as you said it is not acceptable.”

    That’s another issue, why adoption is not acceptable, maybe it is about time for us to change that fact, why not to adopt!! what if two people got married and one of them can’t have kids! Divorce?? why to ruin such a happy family with that harmful thing, why can’t they ADOPT a child and give him/her a great life, we have so many orphans that are looking for a home, for a father and a mother to love them and be there for them! why is it not allowed! we have to do something about that, for the people and for the kids who want the right to be at a home and the right of love!

    “I wish that gay guys would never marry, cause they would be literally killing the girls..7aram..”

    Gay guys are not supposed to get married to girls in the first place, they do that because of the restrictions they have from their surrounding, they get FORCED into that, nobody has the right to ruin anybody else’s life, if these guys have the right to get married to one another, they will not be ruining or as you said “killing” girls/women!

    “I will never forgive him for ripping my life.”

    Forgiveness is hard, forgiveness is difficult, I am sure everyone of us has a story about that, it doesn’t happen overnight, it takes time, they say wounds will heal, wounds will never heal, they create a scar, but be sure that he would never do such thing to you if he wasn’t forced into it, I know you will ask “Why me then!” well, Life has its ways with showing us why we are living this life, it puts us in certain tests to see how we will survive it and what we will learn from it and what we will GAIN out of it, be sure of one thing, you went through such a thing for a reason, there must be a reason, don’t they say that there’s always a fire behind that smoke (or sty like that :p), take your time, heal and start figuring it out!

    Jane, I know you’ve been a victim in this marriage and be sure that your husband (or ex-husband at this point) is a victim as well, a victim of a society that bans such things, I respect your religious views and moral about everything, but maybe this was a sign for you to prevent such thing from happening to someone else by awaking such thoughts in people’s minds, be a part of a changing generation, gain strength out of such an experience and never give up hope, Life is beautiful, show Life that you are up to the challenge that it put you into, don’t stay on your knees, stand up and be the change a lot of women are going through, let’s have a great society where people are with the ones they truly love! again, get your strength out of such an experience and never give up, BE the change into a better society🙂

    Apologies for my long reply, you might find some repeated point but I ain’t going back to read through it, sorry guys!! :p

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  10. Raeesa says:

    Hi all, i have no idea what book this is, but after reading that letter I want to know!

    I am married for almost a year and like “Jane” said people won’t understand, all I can say is Jane, yes I don’t understand the feeling of being married to a gay, but what I do understand is the hurt and betrayal that came up. Its not easy, and while I can give advice or say what you must do now, all I can say to you is well done! I applaud you for atleast trying to fix your marriage!

    So many people give up so easy but you TRYed!

    May allah give you the strength to carry on!

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  11. Suleiman says:

    @Raeesa, the novel is called “3aroos Amman” by Fadi Zagmout, our Arab Observer🙂 – it is a great novel, it tells the reality that thousands choose to deny!

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  12. @Devil’s Mind, thank u for answering back and sharing..I guess my story has so many details that should be summerized for writing, so it wouldnt be clear to u.. i know that i suddenly transformed my ex from being extremely good to extremely bad.. probably this is not right..he wasnt a monster in marriage, and he wasnt an angel in engagement, ME NEITHER..but whatever our flaws were, betrayal, deceipt and discovering that u live with someone u dont know, makes any good deed an act.. am sorry but no one who loves someone can betray them, or hurt them. So maybe am too edgy but that is who I am..am not a person who knows what gays are, and i dont accept them, he knew that very well.. why to put me under this ????so all those deeds makes any good thing erased, am sorry..

    u keep giving excuses that they have to do this, and I would keep saying NO.. if u want to hurt someone, u will find all the excuses, and if u want to hurt someone, u will find all the excuses to do it..

    I didnt emphasize also, that he betrayed years of friendship,, for me he is a very good actor..when u love someone, or respect someone u will not hurt them deliberately..

    Anyways, what i want to say also and this is very important, as i said in the letter being married to a gay man is not a problem of lack of sex, cause this is tolerable.. It is the problems that arise with this, from the man who should prove to the woman and to the world that he is a man, whille he cant and the woman, who has no clue why her hasband abandons her and doesnt show any interest in her and loves any opportunity to run away of the house.that is what makes life hell..cause when acting has an ending, u cannot keep acting that u r the husband and u want your wife while u dont.. u will be sick of this and she will be sick of your lies..

    For me, even if the guy was an angel and the wife discovers he is gay, then he is a jerk.. cause being a divorced woman is a situation embedded on me, whiile his option of getting married knowing fully that he cannot respect marriage is a situation he put himself in, if he respected the marriage or if he respected me or loved me truly , he wouldnt have done it..

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  13. @Suleiman.. Thank you for your wonderful reply.. u really made me feel well.. thanks for giving your time and effort to write these wonderful words.,your letter really raised me up, and comforted me somehow.. thanks again

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  14. ArabObserver says:

    Sometimes I wonder if people do actually know what gay means. I mean, when you said Jane that the family of your ex husband knew that he is gay, do you know what they knew exactly? Because capturing their son in a same sex action or figuring out that he has some same sex attraction doesn’t usually translate into a real knowledge for the parents of what that means. They’d assume it is a phase, and they’d assume it is the lack of sex with the opposite sex. They’d think that things would work out and get fixed if they get him to marry. Same applies to him. In many times, and because of social intolerance and religious objection, gay men and women don’t really understand the extend of their emotions. They struggle with it for many years and try to “fix” it in many ways. They deprive themselves sex, they fast, they pray, and they try to get married convincing themselves that they can handle it and live a normal happy life. I don’t think that your ex deliberately wanted to hurt you Jane. I know that it is horrible what he did to you. It is a selfish act. Totally selfish. And while I blame him, I find myself blaming the intolerante society more. As Ali put it in the book “I play their game so that I don’t get burn by their fire”

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  15. “being a divorced woman is a situation embedded on me, whiile his option of getting married knowing fully that he cannot respect marriage is a situation he put himself in, if he respected the marriage or if he respected me or loved me truly , he wouldnt have done it..”

    I completely agree. He had his own problems, but instead of dealing with them, he chose to take the easy way out at your expense. That is something that is completely true and does demonstrate lack of respect and love.

    But I do see things in a little bit less of black and white fashion. There are degrees of love and degrees of respect… So while I wouldn’t jump to the conclusion the he did not love or respect you, he obviously his did not love you strongly enough to rise up to the moment and deal with his problems without getting you in his mess. I agree, love and respect demand that a person matures and handles issues themselves.

    Most of all, I would describe your x-husband as irresponsible and immature.

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  16. Suleiman says:

    @Jane, well, I am glad I was able to help somehow, my true pleasure🙂 but as Naddoush said, you were both victims of an unforgiving society!!

    I truly dislike how our society looks at the whole marriage thing! especially the ones that happen in like 2 months! I mean SERIOUSLY PEOPLE!!! am with Devil’s Mind about this whole traditional marriage thing! people should take time to know each other, people here look at other cultures were a man and a woman can live together for a long time, be together, live together, sleep together, have a full life together before they make such a commitment with marriage! marriage is not a game, one day you’re in and one day you’re out, unfortunately for some it is like that, but I, in my personal opinion, I love how other cultures (western obviously) can have such a life style with living together before they get into this big commitment, why not! what’s so shameful about it! but to hurry up the whole thing and after a couple of months the man calls for divorce because he’s not happy and the woman is left with the title of (Divorced, which I will talk briefly about in a bit) how is that supposed to make people happy! we have so many flaws in this, yet again, called The perfect life or the perfect wedding tradition or whatever!

    His parents did bad to him, and yes, what did they exactly know about him being gay, if they TRULY knew why gay life is all about you wouldn’t, nor him, be a victim in this situation! gay life isn’t about having sex with another man!! It is another form of living! people here are not knowledgable enough or at all about anything, which is a shame in our society, their knowledge base is based on porn they watch online, that’s not knowledge! that’s why people have the false image about gay people (men or women) or any “different” lifestyle!!

    and about this title of “Divorced”! what’s wrong with a divorced woman/man! nothing, they are still human beings, they still have feelings, they still have a future ahead of them! why if someone gets a divorce around here it is like “the end of the world” for them! it should not, it is supposed to be a sign for a NEW BEGINNING!!! you’ve been given the chance to have a new better start, why not! go for it! I recently watched an episode of “Project Runaway” on TV, and they replaced their models with DIVORCED WOMEN! and man aren’t these ladies happy or what, some were happy to be back single, some are dating and some are looking forward to a new beginning! being Divorced in our society is like being sentenced to death for a woman, why! no woman should let that happen to her, get back into your life, celebrate your new chance!

    I don’t mean to be disrespectful toward you nor your situation, Jane, but this is for the best, he won’t put you in more pain and he’ll be able to live his life the way he should’ve done without getting into this, and now you have your own chance to rise and shine into a better beginning🙂 so the very best of luck for you and even for him, you both were the victims in this one, unfortunately!

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  17. Jess says:

    I’m writing this because it wasn’t until a short time ago that I felt absolutely alone in my experience as an “ex-gay spouse.” I didn’t know who I could talk to, who would understand or where to even begin looking for the support I so desperately needed. I share my story to show others that their experience is not as unique as it feels…and to shed light to the men (and women) who hide their sexuality from the world, and perhaps even themselves, just how much damage can be created. I don’t judge another based upon their sexuality- but ALL of us, gay, straight, bi-sexual, have an obligation to those who love us, those who share our dining room tables and beds, to be honest.

    I married Josh after a very tumultuous relationship. We both made our share of mistakes in the beginning, but we worked on them and came back stronger than ever. Or so I thought. Our wedding was small, with our (then) 6 month old daughter as the flower girl. We had finally achieved the dream- we were a family in every meaning of the word- at last.

    Our happiness only lasted a few months…if that… if we were ever happy at all. In July of that very year, just days before our little girls first birthday I noticed he had been browsing “casual encounters” on Craigslist. I was curious, what was he looking at? I didn’t expect to find an ad, posted by him, with his cell number within, looking for sex with men. I was absolutely devastated. I called him at work and told him he needed to come home, that we needed to talk. He denied it, refused to come home early and when he came home later that night he acted like nothing had happened. I didn’t know what to do. I sat with this knowledge for weeks. Months. Eventually his affairs became more obvious- he is a mechanic and would call me to say he was working late and would come home at 9 at night, clean, as if he had showered. He was sending and receiving texts that were secretive. I dug a little deeper and hacked into his email. In it I found emails from several men arranging dates. My next step was to get my hands on his cell phone. In that I found sexually explicit texts to and from another man “Bud.” One of them suggested he get tested for Chlamydia because “one of the other guys” had tested positive for it. I was 7 months pregnant with our son at the time and nearly went crazy with anger, disbelief and grief.

    How could he do this to me, to his children, to HIMSELF? How could he lie to me about something so fundamental? Was everything I ever believed about him, about us, a lie??? What does this say about me as a woman? Did I “turn” him gay? My world was in pieces at my feet and I didn’t know how to find them all, much less put them back together.

    I wrestled with all of this while at the same time trying to find a way to make our marriage work. I wasn’t the perfect wife. I was angry, mistrustful, bitter- but under all of that was a very deep hurt. I wanted to believe in us, in our dream, in our love…. During all of this I learned he was also doing drugs. In an insane attempt to save my marriage and lesson the friction, I began participating with him. I thought it would bring us closer together. It nearly destroyed me. One of our “highs” ended with me having a stroke. I am grateful that I have recovered from it (mostly) but that night is a very scary reminder of how far I was willing to go to put something back together that was irrevocably broken.

    The distance between us grew and the trust was non-existent. Still, I clung, now I don’t know if I clung to the marriage as an ideal or what I wanted us to be, but neither were good.

    A month ago, we separated. Finally. I still love him. I don’t have a switch that I can just turn off. I’m still faithful, physically and emotionally, to our marriage even though we now live separate lives. I don’t know how to NOT be… I am learning how to let go, one little bit at a time.

    The separation has given me clarity. It has allowed me to see that I can’t love him straight, or sober. It has allowed me to realize that while it hurts deeply, this is what needed to happen for me to be able to find me, to get healthy again, to stop wasting so much time and energy on something I can’t change.

    There are not enough words to describe the devastation this has had on my life, or the lives of my children. But we are coping, we are surviving and we are beginning to thrive, thanks to the support of friends and family who always remind me that I deserve to be with someone who loves me enough to be painfully honest and who respects me enough to be faithful. I will always love and care for my ex. But never again will I allow someone to shred my soul.

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  18. Anonymous says:

    I passed through exactly the same,plus I’m 29 years old now close to 30 as well, the only difference is that i was salma at that time, desperate to get married- the thing that leaded me to this kind of hell marriage-and became laila after the wedding day….
    as for now after divorce & fear.. i don’t know whom i’m, i think i’m lost…:(

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  19. قاسم says:

    I didn’t read the novel honestly but read the letter. I am a gay man and pressured to get married. They don’t know I am gay, and just can’t wait till I do. I am trying to find a lesbian woman to have a sham marriage with just as a facade. Sounds terrible I know, but I don’t want to make any woman’s life miserable, and want to please my parents even if it was fake.

    Like

  20. Hina says:

    I read the letter,i am also passing the same situation, i am 24 years old.
    i found my husband as gay after 10 months of marriage,i didnt understand why parents forced their gays son to ruin others marriage,my husband ruins two lives.
    How can we trust someone who is not true to himself.why they can’t forced back their parents….why they are ruin others lives…

    Like

  21. Aziz says:

    I am writing this from the point of view of the closeted husband. My wife and I have been married for five years. I knew I liked men long before, but hadn’t acted on it. I was raised in a very religious household and was always taught that it was very wrong to feel as I do and that God would punish me forever if I ever committed any act of homosexuality. To those of you who are reading from the outside (from outside of our societies) this may seem crazy. But, a lot of people think this way and live their whole lives in fear.

    I lived and live in fear everyday. Though my belief has faded over the years, I still can’t shake the image of an angry God constantly at my heels. I live in fear of divorce as well because I fear losing my relationship with my son. I fear losing my family. I fear being alone forever and dying alone. My fears are justified because here, if a person is considered “bad” by society, he/she will be cut off. So, I have to play the game.

    Everyday, I die. I feel like I’m sleeping on a bed of thorns-every move hurts, I never feel at ease. I hate to wake up and I hate to sleep because this follows me into my dreams. I hate that I am hurting my wife. She knows something is wrong and she blames herself. Why don’t I want her? Why am I always depressed and angry? What has she done to deserve this? I want so badly to be honest with her, but I know what will happen if I am. So I play the game.

    I had an affair once. I never felt so at ease as when I was with him. Everything, from conversation, to affection, to sex came so easily. I finally realized what my straight friends were talking about when they said their wives made them so happy. But, it couldn’t continue as it was too much of a risk and we ended the relationship.

    I understand that many feel that homosexuality is a sin. And maybe it is. But, why do we force people to live in hell before they’ve even died? My wife is in hell, I am in hell. I am sure it can’t hurt any worse than this. And my biggest fear is that my son will see our relationship and believe that this is what love and marriage are supposed to be like.

    Gay guys, please don’t marry just to please your parents or live a “normal” life. Your life will be far from normal no matter how much you tell yourself it will be OK. I know.

    Like

  22. ArabObserver says:

    Aziz, it must be a very difficult situation you found yourself in. Thank you for sharing your story. I can imagine that amount of fear you live in. Have you read Aroos Amman? I think that lying about your feelings would only keep you and your family in a horrible situation. I would recommend honesty, break those fears, tell your wife and be ready to take responsibility and do what is right for everybody. Don’t let your fear cripple you.

    Like

  23. Hina says:

    yes Aziz tell your wife before she gets to know from any source.she will help you if you tell her.
    may be your fear can take you away from this sin.

    Like

  24. Anonymous says:

    hi, i am a gay (religious) and never have a sex with anyone. i am getting married (being pressurised from my parents), i used to talk to the my finace and i realised that she knows there is something wrong. now we are getting married in 2 months, i dont know whether our marriage will be lasted for long. for sure i cant tell anybody that i am gay and cant marry as it is strongly not acceptable in our society. Is is there anyway i can live a married life and have childern and show and realise to my wife that i love her. should i consult a psycartist to help me continue the long lasting the married life

    Like

  25. Change says:

    Dear Jane and all those women that have gone through similar circumstances,

    I also married a gay man. He is an Asian Muslim male We met at work and I thought fell in love. He proposed and we got married the following year. Prior to the marriage he was affectionate and loving as soon as we got married things changed. He couldn’t bear to be in the same room as me -he would come home late and refused to consummate the marriage. I asked him if he was gay and he would deny this. He lived with his family and when we got married I moved in. I was told that we would only stay there for a year before we would move out.

    His family began to verbally abuse me. His mother hated my being there. It was a very strange situation. Like Jane I was heartbroken that ‘my husband’ refused to sleep with me. I became insecure and suspicious. After several arguments we separated.

    I was heartbroken but with the support of my friends and family have now moved on. I am now applying for an annulment. I just want to say that we can be what we want to be. If society’s backward stereotype states that as divorced women our lives over then we should stand up against that society – stop acting embarrassed, be confident, if people talk let them – they do not provide for you. Who cares what they think.. We need to be that change if we hate what society dictates. The prophet had several wives – he married divorced women and widowers. This backward concept that if you’re divorced you’re written off is created only by society and not our faith. If people look down at you for being divorced then look down at them because they do not understand what you went through.

    I am now happier then I have ever been in my life, This may be due to the fact that my so called ‘husband’ is a Barrister. The embarrassment is now only his.

    Please don’t let this situation bring you down – we need to be the change that we wish to see in the society around us.

    Like

  26. Change says:

    Annoymous – you have no right to ruin another women’s life. You need act like a man and say no to the marriage. How dare you think that it is ok for you to do what you are doing? Believe me what goes around comes around you destroying someone’s life will come back and hit you. You will not be able to pretend that you are in love with her you are GAY – stop playing games.

    Like

  27. ArabObserver says:

    Man, you need to get out of this. This marriage wont work and you will end up misrable. Come up with a fight and break your engagement.

    Like

  28. Anum says:

    Me also married with a gay.He was my first cousin..we were not aware that he is a gay as we both belongs to Muslim family.after marriage we set our house at abroad.i tried to make it home but all the time he has a list of excuses.he comes home late and lying with me.he was not willing to admit that he is a gay he attaracts to them.i left him and came to my homeland..His family abuses me he is not giving me divorce.i applied it at Court but six months passed..He is giving me threats of killing….my only fault is that i choose right path when i came to know he is a gay.

    Like

  29. It’s so sad many women have to go through this, fake love, fake hopes, fake memories, and a broken heart. What’s even worse is the agonies the homosexual men forced to marry a woman (as for a “cure” for homosexuality) have to go through.
    It’s very depressing for both sides.

    Like

  30. noshi bilal says:

    Hey, girl plz get rid of this sitiuation do not spoil ur life….Allah help those who help themselfs…yw cn continue your life once again…plzz try plzz give one chance to your life…go on…..look forward

    Like

  31. i am mccart and i want to thank Dr ALuta for bringing back my ex husband, we broke up for more than 4 month and he told me that he will never want to see me in his life again. i love him so much to the extend that i could not do any thing again, i was confused and depress due to the love i had for him.i did everything i could do to have him come back to me but all went in vain. so i decided to contact a spell caster, i did not believe in spell casting i just want to try it may be it would work out for me. i contacted dr Aruvi for help, he told me that he have to cast a love spell on him, i told him to it. after 5 days my called me and started to apologize for leaving me and also he told me that he still love me. i was very happy and i thank dr Aruvi for helping get back my ex husband back to my hands. his spell is the the greatest all over the world, it was the love spell he cast on my ex that make him come back to me. all you ladies who want back the ex husband back i want you to contact Dr Aruvi at the following email address and get all your problem solve..No problem is too big for him to solve..Contact him direct at freemercifultemple@yahoo.com and get your problems solve like me

    Like

  32. iGay says:

    We are Gay, and we are must Proud To Be Gay. Don’t Judge, Because We don’t know why we Born As Gay. We Just want Live like a Normal, with Love, Friends, and Fun. Just God Know About that. No matter You Black, Asian, White, Or what else, Keep Follow @iGAY_Universal🙂 and Meet a Friend there.

    Like

  33. mark says:

    Thank you thank you DR solution for the good work you just did in my life , my name is Priscilla i was married to my husband for two years and we were living together happily and we both love each other for this two years not until one bad evening when i came back from work late due to scares of transportation and he started queering and he said he does not trust me anymore and he can continue with this marriage anymore and he drove me away from his house unknowingly to him that i was carrying his two month old baby inside me i tried informing him but he won,t listen to me i thought i will never get him back again and i loved him so much and i promise not to rest until am able to get him back to my life so i began to look for a solution and help to get him back this was because i do not want to give birth to a fatherless child so one afternoon as i was browsing on my computer i came across a testimony shared by miss Hanna from UK how she got her ex husband back with the help of Dr solution of (solutiontemple30@gmail.com) so i decided to give him a try and to my best surprise, the spell man cast on my husband work just within two days i contacted him . and today am happily living with my husband and a bouncing baby boy , with all this help rendered to me through this DR solution OF (solutiontemple30@gmail.com ) i will always thank him forever and testify his goodness in my life for other,s to hear an see , once again thank you DR solution for bringing back my family ,

    Like

  34. lina says:

    hii i got divorced last month, my husband was gay, he knew all the time, but he married me cause he wanted kids….

    Like

  35. lina says:

    The problem is that I still love him badly, he’s the love of my life. he cheated me I know but I can’t get over him. I’m depressed, sad and no one can understand my feelings. when I say I still love him they laugh, but I do.

    Like

  36. Ahmed says:

    Hi there
    I am a ‘gay’ man, thank you so much for voicing this issue in an Arabian context. It is really difficult to understand what are you supposed to do about this, especially when God him self doesn’t acknowledge your existence and gives ammo for everyone to say no you are just making this up, or you are just rebelling.

    And with the world of psychiatry, if they don’t like your behavior they will invent a million scenario so that you end up not trusting yourself at all, because supposedly your mind is always playing tricks on you. And you end up your entire life going to a psychiatrist, just to manage to believe that yes one day you will snap out of it…and when you don’t you are bound to resent everyone in your life, or just kill your self to get rid of the pressure.

    And pursuing being gay usually means loosing everything you know including family and friends, people just don’t want to deal with individuals of this nature, they are seen as corrupted and diseased, and should be disposed off, or at least should be hidden under the carpet. And as I travelled to the west I discovered its not just religion, secular people as well dislike homosexuals, so I realized religion just feeds an existing fire.

    I won’t lie I have considered marrying a girl, hoping that things will magically fix themselves, because thats what everyone in my life who knows keeps telling me, even gay ‘religous’ people themselves…so it is hard not to fall into that trap when everyone is telling you, you are a coward for not taking the risk of marrying a girl.

    But I have always felt its simple…if I was a girl I wouldn’t want to be in such a situation, unless I am a lesbian which is I tried to find…but its difficult to figure out how to find one who’d want this.

    I don’t know if being gay is right or wrong, or what should I do about it, all I dream of is to spend my life with someone I love who I imagine to be a guy…and just…have fun, eat things, help who needs help, and go home and sleep. But somehow that is something that God would rather you be pushed of a cliff for.

    I am not saying to the girls you should forgive and get over it, but you should know I guess what probably goes through the guys mind, I think most of them genuinely think things will work out, because that is what everyone else tells them, and the alternatives are impossible. The idea of shame, and not admitting in public to being gay, and that these kinda issues should not be talked about is why there is such a mess….denial is not a sin in the arab world its a virtue.

    Most girls here say gays shouldn’t marry a girl…but they wouldn’t dare say he should just find a guy to be happy with..cause thats not how you see it either…they are just supposed to disappear to thin air, and have no desires. We need a practical solution to this problem…if treatment actually worked people wouldn’t go through all this trouble…so…anyways…wanted to voice out my opinion.

    Like

  37. ArabObserver says:

    Ahmed, thank you for voicing out your opinion.. you make a good point.. if society doesn’t expect gay people, other innocent people would always pay the price. Modern psychology sees homosexuality as a natural sexual orientation. The question is not about right and wrong, it is about being true to your self and people around you.

    Like

  38. lina says:

    I don’t know I felt that he loved me, he was jealous if I talked to another guy, and when we used to fight during engagement and I threaten him that I would leave him he started to cry, dunno what happened may be it’s my fault…may be I did something wrong..

    Like

  39. ArabObserver says:

    Lina, there is no prove scientific method that would alter one’s sexual orientation.. that is a better answer than saying there isn’t a treatment because being gay is not a disease. Maybe he loved you but if he is purely homosexual, he wouldn’t have any sexual attraction towards you. Love, jealousy and sexual attraction are different human emotions that can be connected but are not mutually exclusive.

    One thing you have to keep in mind. It IS NOT your fault🙂. If you like email me or send me a msg over facebook to talk more about this privately🙂

    Like

  40. Muslim woman says:

    Salam, actually jane story was exactly the same with my life now. I have a gay husband,and we’re still together till now (7years marriage). We have 1 daughter. I just found that my husband is gay about 2 years ago. In fact i’m not 100% happy with my life. Because he often act like he hates me. But sometime he’s fine. He cheated me had affair with other gay man. And it was horrible. Till now,that things still make me sick. I don’t know what to do. I love him. And i know he’s struggling with his problem. Sometimes i felt “i hope this was just a bad dream”. But I’m really grateful to have a beautiful daughter in mine.

    For jane thank allah u’re just about ending ur marriage in 2 months and still don’t get kids with u, because it is 1000 times harder to deal with this kind of life if u already got kids. May allah always protect our children forever. Aammeenn…

    Thanks for the chance to share this. This was my first time to share my story life to others. Never had one before. Such a release..

    Like

  41. Muslim woman says:

    Arabobserver, are u an expert for this kind of issues? Im just wondering if i need someone to share with. Thank u so much. I thought it was only me who had this problem. Now i know i have many friends with the same experience.

    Like

  42. ArabObserver says:

    Muslim woman, I have discussed this situation in my novel Aroos Amman, maybe you should check it out. You are also welcome to send me an email if you want to discuss this further.

    Like

  43. I recently saw a testimony about a spell caster of some sort in a blog i visit for relationship and dating problems because i had been having serious issues with my boyfriend and we had been dating for six months, he just suddenly changed, he was returning my calls, he started cheating, he was hurting me in so many ways i never thought possible and I just thought I should try it maybe out of desperation of some sort And I contacted them. At first everything felt dreamy and unbelievable, their consultations and solution was a little bit easy and strange and I was scared a little cos I heard read and heard lots of stories of fake spell casters, scams and i never really believed in magic. I played along with a little hope and faith and I was sent some few stuffs after everything and it worked like a miracle, everything went to a while new direction, it was and is amazing…I guess it was all good faith that made me read That particular post that faithful day. I hope they could help other people too like they did me…I did a little and I got everything i wanted and wished for my husband, my family and my life back the address is dryakubuspelltemple@gmailcom

    Like

  44. latina says:

    My Name is latina I am the happiest person on earth today because today My five years run away lover came back to me on his knees with tears on his eye begging me to forgive him and accept him back, Doctor obosianzen a great Spell caster made this possible with the help of a spell. i saw his email on the internet where a girl post on how Doctor obosianzen helped her so i decided to contact him and he told me that every thing will be fine and now i am happy because Doctor obosiazen is a man of his world because every thing went well as he promised me. Are you having misunderstanding with your love or is your love seeing someone ex ? what is your problem that you want to solve? contact Doctor obosianzen today via email and every thing will be fine okay his email: obosianzenspelltemple@hotmail.com

    Like

  45. After being in relationship with my boyfriend for six years, he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem. Contact him now for your relationship or marriage problems via this email (okunspelltemple@outlook.com)

    Like

  46. Thanks God I found you Dr. Johnbull by helping getting my Ex-husband back because I don’t believe i can remarried Him again after divorced him in 2011 but ever since the divorced am still deeply in love with my ex husband Roland, I really do love him very much with my heart . We have got together in 2008 and I divorced him in 2011 ever since then I have been trying to get him back while reading Prayer Books, The top relationship guide books Until Sunday that i surface on Google to seek Advice On how i can get my ex Husband back after divorced him 2years ago and i cant stop thinking of him and loved him then Google Recommend me to Contact Dr. Johnbull spell caster Email address: johnbullspelltemple@gmail.com, i did contact Dr. Johnbull on the same day which him Assure me that i would have my Ex husband back within 24hrs , i dont believe at first that Love spell work but it Come to Reality to me on the Next day when i saw my EX husband knocking my Door in the Morning and say he want to talk something serious with me Immediately he Kneel Down and give me ring that he want to marry me again
    Thanks Dr. Johnbull for helping me get my Lover back and put smile on my face forever .
    Angela from Spain.

    Like

  47. Komae says:

    Hello every one i want to testify the great work of DR omozokpia who helped me bring back my ex-boyfriend when i was frustrated some months ago, me and my boy-friend have been dating for the past 6 years will love and cherish each other so much that he promise to marry me, one morning my boy-friend call me on phone telling me to come over and see him and i did, when i got there he was telling me different type of story that he is in love with his co-worker that he want to marry her after been with me for good 6 years, he use and dump me. i try all my best to have him back but know one could help till i come across one great spell caster DR Omozokpia and explain everything to him and he promise to return him back to me in just 48 hours, after casting the love and return spell my mark call me on phone asking me to forgiveness him that he still love and cherish me that he want to settle down with me, he came will prepare and did our marriage, right now will are in our honey moon in biggest hotel in Dubai, once again thank you for building my marriage and i will keep on sharing this wonderful testimony you can also reach him at: omozokpialovetemple@outlook.com

    Like

  48. my ex-boyfriend dumped me 8 months ago after I caught him of having an affair with someone else and insulting him. I want him back in my life but he refuse to have any contact with me. I was so confuse and don’t know what to do, so I visited the INTERNET for help and I saw a testimony on how a spell caster help them to get their ex back so I contact the spell caster and explain my problems to him….. he cast a spell for me and assure me of 3 days that my ex will return to me and to my greatest surprise the third day my peter came knocking on my door and beg for forgiveness. I am so happy that my love is back again and not only that, we are about to get married. Once again thank you Dr dele spell, you are truly talented and gifted contact his email: delespellhome@yahoo.com

    Like

  49. Hello,everyone my name is mlmvc from USA i never ever believed in spell until i meet a man called Dr upesa, who help me cast a spell that bring back my ex-lover who left me for one years before our marriage,His spells works beyond my imaginations and today i am happily married two kids and me and my [ex-lover] now husband are very happy more than ever before,what more can i say rather than to say thank you Dr upesa for been there for me,contact him today and your life will never ever remain the same his email is upesalovetemple@gmail.com

    Like

  50. Telling The Very Truth says:

    well i am a Straight Man that recently had my wife leave me for another woman, and i was a very caring and loving husband that was very much committed to her as well. It did certainly hurt me Very Much thinking that i had finally met the woman of my dreams which i really thought that i was going to have a Family too. Now going out is very hard again for me since most of the time i meet the women that are so Very Damn Nasty to talk too, especially when they will walk away from me and tell me not to bother me at all. And i didn’t do anything Wrong for them to act so mean with me, and all that i am hoping for is to meet a good woman again to share my life with. Loneliness certainly hurts when you have no one, and most of my friends were Very Blessed to have met the Right Woman for them which most of them have a Family today as well. There are Much More Women out there that are Gay as well which really makes it very hard for us Good men looking for Love Again, and even the Straight Women are Bi Nowadays which many of them are Now Swinging Both Ways. How Very Sad.

    Like

  51. i from USA i want to share my testimony with the world and also thank a great man called dr malawi racum for bringing joy into my life. it started like this,i hard a true lover celled James brown who promised to love and marry me,we both lived peacefully. one day he met a girl celled Betty and he loved her very much and decided to follow her living me behind,i tried all my effort to make him come back to me but he still decided to be with her.one day i saw an old friend of mine that told me about a great man celled dr malawi racum by name and i said let i give it a try and i contacted him, he told me what i am to do and i did exactly as he said, before the next 48 hours my ex lover came back to me if you need the help of this great man you can reach him on his email address SPELLOFSOLUTIONTEMPLE@GMAIL.COM or contact his cell phone number +2348072371282

    Like

  52. I am raymond . Greetings to every one that is reading this testimony. I have been rejected by my wife after three(3) years of marriage, my wife left me with two kids . I felt like my life was about to end i almost committed suicide, i was emotionally down for a very long time. Thanks to a spell caster called High DRORRIWO which i met online. On one faithful day, as I was browsing through the internet,I came across allot of testimonies about this particular spell caster. Some people testified that he brought their Ex lover back, some testified that he restores womb,cure cancer,and other sickness, some testified that he can cast a spell to stop divorce and so on. i also come across one particular testimony,it was about a woman called laura,she testified about how he brought back her Ex lover in less than 7 days, and at the end of her testimony she dropped DRORRIWO e-mail address. After reading all these,I decided to give it a try. I contacted him via email and explained my problem to him. In just 3 days, my husband came back to me. We solved our issues, and we are even happier than before. High temple of DRORRIWO is really a gifted man and i will not stop publishing him because he is a wonderful man… If you have a problem and you are looking for a real and genuine spell caster to solve all your problems for you. Try DRORRIWO anytime, he might be the answer to your problems. Here’s his contact:{DRORRIWO@GMAIL.COM

    Like

  53. patra says:

    Life can be very displeasing especially when we loose the ones we love and cherish so much. in this kind of situation where one loses his/her soul mate there are several dangers engage in it. one may no longer be able to do the things he was doing before then success will be very scarce and happiness will be rare. that person was created to be with you for without him things may fall apart. That was my experience late last year. but thank god today i am happy with him again. all thanks to DR ORRIWO, i was nearly loosing hope until i saw an article on how DR ORRIWO could cast a love spell to make lovers come back. There is no harm in trying, i said to my self. i contacted him via email: drorriwo@gmail.com. words will not be enough to appreciate what he has done for me. i have promised to share the good news as long as i live.i am patra

    Like

  54. veronica says:

    Hi everyone i will never forget the help the drorrriwo Shrine render to me in my marital life. i have been married for 4 years now and my husband and i love each other very dearly . after 3 years of our marriage my husband suddenly change he was having an affair with a lady outside,i notice it then i was praying for divine intervention the thing became more serious i told my pastor about it we prayed but nothing happen. my husband just came home one day he pick up his things and left me and the kids to his mistress outside at this time i was confuse not knowing what to do again because i have lost my husband and my marriage too. i was just checking my mails in the office when i saw someone sharing her testimony on how the drorriwo help her out with her marital problems so i contacted the email of drorriwo. I told he my problem and i was told to be calm that i have come to the right place that i should fill some information concerning my self i did after some time she called me again congratulating me that my problems will be solve within 13days. he told me what went wrong with my husband and how it happen. that they will restored my marriage but i will make a free donation to their Shrine anything my heart told me. to my greatest surprise my husband came to my office begging me on his knees that i should find a place in my heart to forgive him i quickly ask him up that i have forgiven him.friends your case is not too hard why don’t you give drorriwo a trier he powewerful and kind. i know he will also bring back your husband. i promise to keep sharing he good work any time i’m on the internet. when ever i come accros a forum like this, i always share the testimony. contact he via drorriwo@gmail.com..am veronica

    Like

  55. Brim Nichol says:

    Greeting to any body that is reading my comment, All Thanks goes to DR OLOKUM, i was married to my husband, and we were living fine and happy. it come to an extend that my husband that use to love and care for me, those not have my time again, until i fined at that he was having an affair with another woman, i try to stop him,all my effort was in-vain sadly he divorce me and went for the woman. he live me with two of our kids, i cry all day, i was in pains, sorrow and looking for help. i was reading a news paper, i saw how dr. trust help people with his love and reuniting spell. so i decided to contact him and explain my problem to him, he did a love spell that make my husband to come back to me and our kids and never think of the woman. this man is god sent to restore heart break and reunite relationship. may the lord be your strength and continue to use you to save people relationship and any problem they encounter contact him for help LAVENDERLOVESPELL@YAHOO.COM i promise you that you, he will but a smile on your face and make you feel happy. good luck.

    Like

  56. salmaan says:

    Would it be that the believers would turn to sorcery rather than Allah for assistance? Laa houwla wa laa kuwwata illa billahil aliyyil azeem!

    Jane. Very sad to hear your story. I think there are so many Muslims turning gay because they leaving marriage too late and all the women are covered head to toe.

    I’m a single guy, looking to get married. Its so difficult….would I have sexual relationship with a guy? Never….unless my wife desired it.
    but I can see how so many guys turn homosexual.

    Its funny how a straight guy can’t find a wife and gay guys are wasting women by marrying them! Actually its sad.

    What a twisted world we live in.

    Any single women in ksa looking for marriage to a straight guy….get in touch.

    Like

  57. Anonymous says:

    Do you have English translation of this book? Is it available in Bahrain ?

    Note : Please delete all the spam messages shown above as its really interrupting the discussion.

    Like

  58. Stephanie says:

    Stephanie
    Good day, my name is Stephanie and i would love to share a wonderful testimony. I was happily married for about Four years before me and my husband started having problems haven tried some spell casters i thought all hope were lost and i cried for a long time before i was introduced to a prophet called Brian Carn by a friend of mine that helped put everything back in order by his special prayers and today we are still happily married so i want to use this media to challenge anyone of you who is passing through difficulties to contact this man, we were created to have the best of life not to cry every night and day i know how it hurts because have been there so if you know you are passing through any challenge contact him on his email prophet Dr,kokotemple@mail.com this is the best spell caster that has ever lived am so sure of that because he has also helped some of my friends.again his email is Dr,kokotemple@mail.com

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  59. I am joes candra, I promise to share this testimony all over the world once my boyfriend return back to me, and today with all due respect i want to thank DR.OSAUYI for bringing joy and happiness to my relationship and my family. I want to inform you all that there is a spell caster that is real and genuine. I never believed in any of these things until i loosed my boyfriend, I required help until i found a grate spell caster, And he cast a love spell for me, and he assured me that I will get my boyfriend back in two days after the spell has been cast. Three days later, my phone rang, and so shockingly, it was my boyfriend who has not called me for past 6 years now, and made an apology for the heart break, and told me that he is ready to be my back bone till the rest of his life with me. DR.OSAUYI released him up to know how much i loved and wanted him. And opened his eyes to picture how much we have share together. As I`m writing this testimony right now I`m the most happiest girl on earth and me and my boyfriend is living a happy life and our love is now stronger than how it were even before our break up. So that`s why I promised to share my testimony all over the universe.All thanks goes to DR.OSAUYI for the excessive work that he has done for me. Below is the email address in any situation you are undergoing a heart break, and I assure you that as he has done mine for me, he will definitely help you too. OSAUYILOVESPELL@GMAIL.COM that is his email address bye

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  60. HOW I GOT MY HUSBAND BACK!!!

    Thank you for your article! It touches my heart deeply because I have recently went through something similar case .About 3 years ago my husband left me and 2 of our kids for 3years to another woman. During this years of our separation I was so broken, so I finally went to a friend of mine who directed me to a spell caster Dr. Akim who helps me in reuniting my family and then i felt peace and felt whole love again. After the casting of the love spell, My Ex-husband offered me a job, to work at his His company. so I obeyed and went. After working together in 1 week we had come closer & starting dating and hanging out as a family with the kids again, Dr. Akim has restored our marriage in a way I have NEVER expected, but I’m truly Thankful!

    Contact Dr. Akim today on: bestspellhome@gmail.com
    Tel:+2348159645271
    Best Regards

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  61. My name is gloria,am from the states. I want to testify of a great spell caster called grace,this great spell caster brought my ex husband back to me after one year of abandoning me and our kids to elope with another lady.Am so happy and much grateful to gracr for restoring joy back into my life after one year of pains and sorrows.You too can contact grace via his email address, Gracerelationshipspell@gmail

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  62. After being in relationship with him for 3 years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the other ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email is dr. oputelspellcaster@gmail.com you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or any other problem.

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  63. Mahrk Lyev11111 says:

    Being attracted to the same sex in countries like USA,UK Canada is really easily as i have heard.There are still people there who don’t like people like us but it not as bad as that of Russia cos here we are beaten jailed and sometimes even killed.You can’t hold the hand of the one you care about in the public so as to avoid been harassed we can even set a place to me cos if we are caught we face jail time.Here in Russia we gay are prisoner in our own country.I am currently in a relation with my fiance and we had to leave Russia to be together.Before now his parent were against our relationship cos they had no idea he was gay we sneaked around knowing the risks if we were to be caught.When he finally got heart to tell him family the rejected him and asked he stops seeing me or they were going to turn him in and that scared him a lot his father is a very powerful man in Russia and he made it possible for him not to be able to live the country i mean as long as you have money in Russia anything goes.I was lucky they never got to meet me cos if they did i would have not been here right now writing this article that you are all reading.Probably i would have been in jail.Months passed and there was no way we could see each other cos they had him watched to make sure he is never get to meet me and also to know the person the was he was practicing this profane act with as they called it.They stripped him of all his right to the family assets and made him an outcast i could see he was suffering form the text he was sending me they made his life miserable and made him end our relationship.I knew he was confused and did know what to do to get his life back to make his family see him the way they use to.And i knew that his family were never going to accept his life style cos they are so anti gay.If they were to be a fund riser to fight gay practice in Russia his family will be the first to ask that they host it.I love him so much but he was scared of him family and they also had a grip on him.I know most person don’t believe in what about to say but still if it wasn’t for Mutton Osun a spell caster that i found on the internet i would not have been writing this.It happened maybe by a slim chance or fate that i was a blog were it happened that i read three distinct comment about how he help them with similar problem.I contacted him with an email address that was in the comment.I asked Mutton Osun to cast a spell to make my then boyfriend to make up his mind to run away from Russia with me to be together and also his family as in his father to make it possible for him to leave Russia with me and set a very comfortable life for us were we were going.And i know doing spells with someone you can’t even see is outrageous but i promise you he makes you feel more at else when he calls and he really goes through with his promise cos he did with mine he was really helpful to him and kind.And like other people said he doesn’t even charge you for what he is doing for you.I had to provide some list of materials that he asked that i get for my spell casting.I preferred that i sent the money down to him cos they were not easy to find and even when i found them it was so expensive but he could get them cheaply.He instructed me on how to make the spell work with great effect.It took 7 seven day and night to see it result.On the seventh night my boyfriend call me to tell me we could finally be together cos his father did agreed to do all i asked mutton osun to make him do i just knew at once it was Mutton Osun spell cos it what i asked for and now me and fiance are the happiest right now we can hold hand now without fear of being harassed or sent to jail for we are in love and we are very comfortable here.His father made sure everything was set before we even got here just like i asked it should be.Am going to also leave Mutton Osun email here just like others have done for contact purpose godsofosunx @ rocketmail. com

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  64. This is a testimony that i will tell every one to hear. i have been married four 6years abandon the 7th year of my marriage, another woman had a spell to take my lover away from me and my husband left me and the kids and we have suffered for 3years until i met a post where this man Dr Osaze have helped someone and i decided to give him a try to help me bring my lover back home and believe me i just send my picture to him and that of my husband and after 4 days as he have told me, i saw a car drove into the house and behold it was my husband and he have come to me and the kids and that is why i am happy to make every one of you in similar problems to met with this man and have your lover back to your self. His email:”spirituallove@hotmail. com”

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  65. After being in relationship with him for 3 years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should rather contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that never believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I mailed the spell caster, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the other ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email is DRAISEDIONSPELLCASTER@gmail.com you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or any other problem.

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  66. Marrian says:

    Is good to shear a good thing to the entire world, i am miss Marian from united kingdom, I promise to share this testimony all over the world once my boyfriend return back to me, and today with all due respect i want to thank DR.ODUDUWA for bringing joy and happiness to my relationship and my family.I want to inform you all that there is a spell caster that is real and genuine. I never believed in any of these things until i loosed my boyfriend, I required help until i found odudowawa@gmail.com a grate spell caster, And he cast a love spell for me, and he assured me that I will get my boyfriend back in 48hours, after the spell has been cast. within that 48hours my phone rang, and so shockingly, it was my boyfriend who has not called me for past 10 years now, and made an apology for the heart break, and told me that he is ready to be my back bone till the rest of his life with me.DR ODUDUWA released him up to know how much i loved and wanted him. And opened his eyes to picture how much we have share together. As I’m writing this testimony right now I’m the most happiest girl on earth and me and my boyfriend is living a happy life and our love is now stronger than how it were even before our break up. So that’s why I promised to share my testimony all over the universe. All thanks goes to DR ODUDUWA for the excessive work that he has done for me. Below is the email address in situation you are undergoing a heart break, and I assure you that as he has done mine for me,he will definitely help you too. even call him on this number:+2347031198913

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  67. Baldwin Willard says:

    From my observation i noticed most people think spell casting is all and only Spam. Yes you can say that almost everything on the Internet is more or less Spam this days. I could have with no two thought said just that last year but Metodo Acamu a spell caster made me see there are still few good spell caster out there. Before now, i wasn’t a good father or a husband. I almost lost everything i had. As a matter of fact i lost everything i had. I lost my two kids and my wife and my job because i am an alcoholic. I was mostly always drunk throughout the entire day i pushed everybody away that really wanted to help me my wife my friends my mom i was just all about the alcohol. For two years i lived just being a drunk who had no one and who had nothing to live for, i was totally useless.When i realized myself it was rather to later even after i became sober and started fixing my life. She was remarried and living happily and wanted nothing to do with me. I wanted my wife back and wanted to be a part of my children life. Me wanting back my family was not only a step to get my life back together it was also a step to prove to my wife though i am an alcoholic, i can stay sober and be responsible for her and my children. Heaven knows i tried all i can to prove to her that i have changed and i am ready to love her with my life just like how it was before i ruined it. I got her back even with the help of Metodo Aamu a spell caster i was referred to on the Internet. Whatever he did for me made my wife and my kids come back to me. All that was required from me were materials needed for the spell casting. I wish i can write in detail about how all this happened to make those who need help believe that spell casting can yield good result but it really about the heart if you think Metodo Acamu can help you with your problem contact him here metodoacamufortressx[AT]yahoo{DOT}com note:use this email the way you use yours in the stand email format and i promise you, he can take all your troubles away, As his spell casting is harmless and don’t have any effect in ones life.

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