It is OK to live without honor


21 thoughts on “It is OK to live without honor

  1. Farah says:

    The things is, it’s not about living without honor, its that honor is misinterpreted as only related to women basically having no interaction with the opposite sex.

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  2. Yes Farah I agree, but maybe it is time to tell people who believe that honor lies in the vagina, that so what if they lost it?! It is OK! Not the end of the world!

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  3. Fawzi says:

    Observer,To approach this issue by asking is “is it ok to live without Honor?” means that you acknowledge the crimes as ones that protect honor! These crimes are vicious and horrendous and have nothing to do with Honor. Some women are killed because they have been raped, or inheritance issues (where the brother wants a larger share of the inheritance) or refusing to marry a suitor the family picked out. Many of the women who are killed are found to be virgins after autopsies. Even if a woman is none of the above, that gives no one the right to kill her. There are courts of law that would deal with a supposed misconduct (so much for sexual freedom) and brothers, uncles and fathers have no right to take “justice” unto their own hands. These Crimes protect families’ reputations according to societal misinterpretations of honor. I believe that it is preposterous, sad and alarming that there are some people who still defend the so called Crimes of Honor, and the laws that protect them. This violates the most important human right; the right to life. What I also find to be extremely sad is that there are many women (the majority of the Jordanian female population actually) who support keeping the laws that protect murderers under the cover of Honor Crimes. A petition several years back failed to collect a measly 50,000 signatures that would abolish these laws.As a Jordanian society, and as long as we allow these laws to exist we will remain backwards and primitive. Honor by definition is what makes you a respectable person; I would personally spit in the face of an honor-murderer, that’s how honorable I think they are. We want women rights, gender equality, sexual and religious freedom, but we still have criminals who commit their crimes under the cover of Honor Crimes, who manage to get out of jail within months of their crimes praised and glorified by family and society. I’m sorry but this unspeakable and devastating. A person who has done amazing work regarding the issue of Honor Crimes is writer Rana Husseini of the Jordan times.

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  4. Anonymous says:

    maybe we should hold up signs at their court hearings that say “nobody honors you anyway, why try and protect it?”hehehehehehhe

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  5. Farah says:

    “maybe it is time to tell people who believe that honor lies in the vagina, that so what if they lost it?! It is OK! Not the end of the world!” You seriously want to pitch that in a country that criminilizes adultery and derives most most of its constitution from Islamic law? that’s just not realistic. What we should be working on is destroying the mentality which attaches the burden of the so-called honor on the females, and deleting the part of the law which says it’s okay will deter those who kill in the name of their honor. The question is when (or should I say if) they do, what is going to happen to the women whose honor is in question? abused for the rest of their lives, forced to commit suicide perhaps? What a lovely world.

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  6. fawzi, I agree with you, all of those crimes has nothing to do with honor the way me and you understand it, but for a big chunck of our society, honor does lie in the vagina of their women! It doesn’t seem to work telling them over and over again that this is wrong. They don’t want to hear anything else! So maybe it is the time for us to stop making big emphasize on honor, because the word seems to be a relative concept anyway, and it is causing us more trouble than it benefits! Not just about honor killings, but in every other aspect of our lives where we do literally prefer death than having our fake honor tarnished! Let’s tell people that honor is overrated. Life is more important, and loving your fellow human being tops it all.anonymous, that would be a good idea! There is no honor in killing anyonefarah, I know that it does sound insane, but maybe we need to shock people! We need to shake them and wake them up! It is enough attaching honor to females in such degrading matter. If that is the honor they know, then it is okay to lose it, and is okay to live without it!

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  7. fawzi says:

    Farah, Adultery (Sexual intercourse by a married person with someone other than their spouse) is punished by law in most societies, or a legal reason for divorce in the mildest cases, and should stay that way (why get married in the first place???). I think what you meant to say is sex out of wedlock is criminalized. I do agree with you on your other points. The laws need to be changed, proper shelters for women who are in danger need to be built and properly run, for which there were numerous promises to build, but instead the women are thrown in Jail “for their own protection”. So instead of a feeling of safety these women are treated like prostitutes and criminals by the legal entities that are there to protect them.In social circles most of the people who would oh so dearly be against crimes of honor, have their daughters, sisters, wives, mothers, aunts, nieces locked up to protect their honor! People need to speak out, issues like this need to be addressed in education from early stages in ones life, and in the media. abolishing the laws should happened and it would serve as a deterrent for the criminals, but changing this societal concept of “fake honor” as you like to call it would take generations and a lot of work.Anyway, observer thank you for addressing this issue, more and more people should be doing the same.

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  8. I guess I joined in a bit late, but I agree with what you all had to say (Observer, Farah, and Fawzi)…Honor is a very vague word. Although it is important to be a respectable, honorable person, this shouldn’t be confused with sexual relationships for that person, or any of the people who are “blood-related”, be them females or otherwise.As a matter of fact, in Jordan dignity is something that you barely find. Dignity is an important part of honor that is totally ignored in our Arab countries, although it is sacred to people in advanced countries.Some people are ready to kill their daughter if she engages in pre-marital sexual activity… But its no problem that they have to live like stray dogs because their government officials are ripping them off… Or being treated like ignorant sheep, through censorship. We live below the “Human” level, and some are worried about who had sex with who: Thats irony!

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  9. Fawzi, well said, you are welcome. Why dont you start your own blog? I can see that you have a lot to say. You can have more people hear you.DM, good point! It is funny how things are messed up around here. We are ready to die for a fake cause, while on the other hand, we have all of those fears to claim our rights and live our lives! Weird!!!

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  10. it’s better to die with honor than live without it, and i seriously mean that. I think what you’ve meant is that the definition of honor should be changed !

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  11. No hareega, life is more important than honor no matter what definition you want to stick to it. It is life that it matter. We should emphasize on that.

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  12. Fawzi says:

    Observer, point taken, my apologies for long comments!!🙂 I don’t seem to be able to shut up when it is something I feel this strongly about tho! Again thnx for approaching the subject.

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  13. it would be hard to change the society’s perceptions and recations regarding one’s honour!the sign targets a certain group of people in Jordan,I wouldn’t find it appropriate to write it in English honestly!

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  14. you are fantastic!!! i love the philosophies you investigate, i adored adams first wife story, you are an intelligent force to be reckoned with ^_^ keep it up!

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  15. Anonymous says:

    Well , It’s not about “living without honor” , But rather about stopping the relation between Sexual organs and honor.. Honor is human it’s a feeling inside. Not a state of a sexual organs -alas- the arab world still has to live 1000 to understand that .

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