A man got his daughter married to a Nabulsi!


A man got his daughter married to a Nabulsi. He warned her, if your husband asks you to turn around, come directly and tell me.

For days, the father kept on asking his daughter whether her husband asked her to turn around or not, and she alway replied negatively. But one day and after few months, she ran to her father and told him that her husband asked her to turn around.

Her father went mad on her husband, he cursed him and ran to punish him. When he reached the husband, he asked him what the hell have you done? Why do you ask my daughter to turn around.

The husband answered, it is time to make a baby!

My father told me this joke this morning which demonstrates how different is the arabic heritage local model of defining sexual acts from the western model which, like a lot of other imported definitions, has dominated the minds of our current generation.

To understand the joke, I have to make some clarification. ‘Nabulsi’ is a reference to people of Nablus, a big city in the west bank. In the common street talk, people of Nablus are famous for their homosexual behaviour. People wink that a Nabulsi is a boy lover. But in the arab culture, homosexuality is an imported definition. Our ancestors have concentrated on defining the sexual acts rather than the sexual attraction/orientation, and thus sodomy (anal sex) is more appropriate in this context and has been the used definition of gay people and other people who engage in anal sex in arabia.

The arabic word for sodomy is ‘Luti’ (in reference to Prophet Lut’s people. A Luti is a man engaged in anal sex activity regardless if it is with another man or another woman. There is no real distinction about the sexual partners, the distinction in the Arab culture is about the sexual act.

While our ancestors were more specific in describing things at a time we built a huge civilisation where science was highly respected, and detiail descriptions were demanded, our current generation of people tend to blur definitions and group things togather where the definition of a Luti became an alternative of homosexual because both a Luti and a homosexual engage in anal sex.

As a result, the sexual orientation of the Nabulsi man in the joke isn’t clear. The father is not worried that his son-in-law would get engaged in sex with another man. He is just worried that his son-in-law would have anal sex with his daughter. He didn’t define clearly to his daughter what ‘turn around’ means. Obviously his daughter turned around her back to her husband since their first sex without realizing that this is what her father warned her off. When her husband asked her to ‘turn around’ to have normal sex, she ran to her father.

It is not uncommon for local people not to accept the term homosexuality as of men who have same sex attraction, for most arabs it is the sexual act itself that matters. If a man prefers anal sex, then it doen’t matter what is the sex of the receptive end. Having anal sex with someone’s wife maybe a solution for many gay men in the mindset of the arab people, while in fact for gay men, it isn’t a matter of loving the butt, it is a matter of sexual attraction and their preference to be in bed with a masculine man rather than a feminine woman.

40 Comments

  1. Is this a sexual education you are trying to give or a racist statement toward the nabulsi People? I found this article lacking the proper content and racist.

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  2. mab3oos, I m just trying to explain things outanonymous1, I am not trying to be racist towards Nabulsi people. Everyone jokes about this, and every Nabulsi man I knew reacted with a laugh. Sometimes they even joke being Nabulsi as a warning of what they are capable of doing. As I said to mab3oos, I m just trying to explain things out.anonymous2, thank you, that is what I tried to do 🙂

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  3. First of all my mom is from nablus, and this stereotype about Nabulsi people is just that. Nothing but idle gossip.Having said that, I’ve heard even Nabulsis joke about this particular stereotype. Then again being Nabulsis gives them the right to joke about Nabulsi stereotypes without being seen as racist.You are the first person I know who considers a man having anal sex with his wife a homosexual.I couldn’t care less how two people (married or not) choose to have sex in private provided they are consenting adults.

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  4. Hani Obed, I didnt say that men having sex with their wives are considered to be homosexuals. I said that Arab people tend to explain things through the act not through feelings. That explains the vagueness of what Nabulsi people are accused of that is demonstrated in this joke.

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  5. Forgive me, I have to master the difference between someone who believes in what a joke stands for, someone who repeats the joke because they think it’s funny, and someone who is trying to interpret why a joke exists. It is not always easy.Still, I don’t think it’s homosexuality that equates 2 men having sex with a man having anal sex with his wife as you suggested to interpret why the father was angry. I think it is Islam since both cases are considered great sin under Islamic law.

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  6. Sorry Fadi, your definition of liwat is wrong. (The act: Liwat, the person, Luti) there is no “Lutyyeh” for females in Arabic. The definition is strictly male.First of all, Liwat means EXPLICITELY two men engaged in a sexual act. (feelings aside) it’s the ACT that defines if it’s liwat or not. The mechanical act of anal sex between two men.A man and a woman engaged in ANYTHING they can sickly envision can NEVER be considered liwat. Also associating “men who enjoy Anal sex with women” with gays is completely wrong and baseless! In fact, there are historic documented cases specifically in this area where men of Mecca used to -commonly- approach their women from behind. While the women of Medina were not accustomed to this and complained about it. Then the rule came to exist that men “SHOULD” approach women in the proper way. SHOULD! It’s not a must. Because if there is consent there is no problem with it happening.A gay person (as you have told me before) doesn’t even like women, it doesn’t matter how he engages in sexual acts with them. He doesn’t even like or enjoy or feel attracted to women. Right? Be it Anally or otherwise, gays don’t like women! Period! Additionally, gay alternate in their roles, that’s going to be pretty interesting to see with a woman!In your [reserve my opinion about how racist this joke is] The father is concerned for the well being of his daughter. He’s concerned that she will be suffering penetration without getting any pleasure out of it. He’s afraid that her husband will hurt her through anal sex. A woman can -and will- get divorce if she is approached from behind against her wish. That’s why the father is concerned. Not for any other considerationAs for gay men, they can party all they like on other men!

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  7. Qwaider, it depends on what you consider “Luti” to mean. Luti is commonly associated with “Kawm Lute” who are known for Sodomy. Assuming this line of thought, you are wrong.Sodomy in the babylon dictionary:<>n. act of anal or oral sex with a member of the opposite sex; copulation with a member of the same sex; bestiality, copulation with an animal <>Homosexuality in the Babylon dictionary:<>n. sexual attraction to members of the same sex <>So neither Sodomy nor Homosexuality are strictly for males. They both can be applied to males and females alike. Also, Sodomy is not necessarily between same-sexes. It can be between opposite sexes, as well as same-sex. Sodomy is basically any kind of sex that falls in the “alternative”!As for the joke. I didn’t have any problems getting the joke, but I don’t agree with The Arab Observer’s explanation. As far as I know, Nabulsies are known to like “Boys”. It is rumored that Homosexuals when they get married (to women, since not until recently Homosexual marriages are allowed) engage in anal sex because it most resembles sex with men.This surely does not mean that people who like anal sex are necessarily homosexuals.

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  8. Qwaider, you mentioned that any sort of sex where both the husband and wife consent is permissble under Islam. Is there a valid source for this ? I’ve had some pretty knowledgable people insist that Anal sex is forbidden even for husband and wife whether the wife approves or not. They usally base it on this Aya from Surat Al-Baqara. I think the English part between parentheses has nothing to do with the actual Arabic text. It sound like pure speculation to me.نِسَآؤُكُمْ حَرْثٌ لَّكُمْ فَأْتُواْ حَرْثَكُمْ أَنَّى شِئْتُمْ وَقَدِّمُواْ لأَنفُسِكُمْ وَاتَّقُواْ اللّهَ وَاعْلَمُواْ أَنَّكُم مُّلاَقُوهُ وَبَشِّرِ الْمُؤْمِنِينَYour wives are a tilth for you, so go to your tilth (have sexual relations with your wives in any manneras long as it is in the vagina and not in the anus), when or how you will, and send (good deeds, orask Allâh to bestow upon you pious offspring) before you for your ownselves. And fear Allâh, andknow that you are to meet Him (in the Hereafter), and give good tidings to the believers

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  9. I checked 4 different dictionaries and they were split! Some said it’s male-male only other said anything that is not penile-vaginal. However, Liwat is strictly MALE on MALE.The proof is from the historic Sunna (I’m not after proving anything religious here, but just stating it from 1400 years ago clarifies the meaning)The history Sunna (and in the Quran) the women are portrayed as a fertile ground and males as the farmer who may farm this land any way they wish. So men-on-women (specifically husbands on wives) are allowed to do WHATEVER! However, male on male is forbidden.And you’re right, this doesn’t make people who do anal sex gay.In fact, the whole idea behind homosexual (as a word) is Same-sex! The minute you break same-sex rule you’re heterosexual and no matter how anyone tries to twist it, it’s still heterosexual

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  10. It’s just an example of how you’re allowed to do whatever you want.A woman may seek divorce (and compensation) for being approached from behind. The rule is, it’s not allowedHowever, if the wife is fine with it. It’s Not HALAL, but as long as both are fine with it … The Aya:فاتوا حرثكم انّى شئتمGives it to you CLEARLY, I don’t need a scholar to explain to me what “Anna” means. It means clearly, however you wish!It’s still not kosher as I said, but it’s NO WHERE NEAR doing it with a man! This whole side argument is really beside the point.

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  11. I checked several other dictionaries, including the reputable “Webster” dictionary, as well as, < HREF="http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=sodomy" REL="nofollow">dictionary.com<> which brings you results from numerous different dictionaries, and they all agree conclusively that it is not male-male only!! Maybe you can tell us which dictionaries gave you the “only” male-male result.

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  12. [DEF: Male homosexual intercourse, construed as act of gross indecency.http://www.nas.gov.uk/guides/legalTerms.asp%5DThere are others, but can you bring me one source that says Liwat is anything but male on male? (There’s a Minor-Liwat which is male on female)Why is (proving what sodomy means) mportant again when we’re talking?I mean, why are we mixing so many different issues into it? One guy wants to prove Islam said it’s completely haram for WOMENThe other is stuck on the definition os SodomyAnd a third drawing conclusions that men who do anal sex with a WOMAN are gay!With all due respect, but can we focus a little bit here? because these are three different discussions [at least] if I’m not mistaken.

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  13. I do not know why you are spending a lot of time and energy on this subject. The best way is Nature’s way and anything else is an aberration regardless of religious scripts that can be interpreted as legitimizing homosexuality in heaven.

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  14. Qwaider, there is no loteyyeh as a term for females engaged in anal sex because the word is associated with the penetrator. A Luti is the one who penetrates the other person (I guess regardless of the receptive sex). This is my whole point, in arabic we base our definition on the act. Luwat is associated with the anal sex. It is minor lewat when it is with a woman, but still is lewat.Maybe the definition was the same before in the west as they have the word sodomy, but then they discovered the sexual orientation and came up with the word homosexual that describes the sexual attracttion rather than the act. It got translated in arabic recently by the word methly.DM, that is also exactly a point i wanted to make. The stupid conclusion of a gay man prefering to have anal sex with his wife because he is used to it! People assume that homosexuality is about the anal sex while it is not. Batir, I didnt get what you wanted to say. What is your definition of natural in this contest?

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  15. In Jordanian law, it is prohibited to have sex from the posterior, i.e behind, i.e anus, i.e. fat7et el sharj, i.e.where all the shit comes out from. I think (not sure) that is referred to as liwat even if the sexes were different, and I know that the law prhibits that even if the 2 parties were consesual. The law can FORCE the married couple to divorce each other if they perform that. The conclusion that if you really wanna do it with your wife, you have to make sure she’s ok with it for 2 reasons:1- If she didn’t agree she can ask for a divorce and get it.2- Even if she wasn’t gonna sue you for it, it still would be a very very bad surprise for your wife.

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  16. I’m only here to correct qwider in one thing…yes q…what u said is absolutely right except for one thing…anna she2tom means ( b2egma3 elfoqaha2 ) vaginal with any position even behind..as long as it’s vaginal…anal is forbidden…in quraan…wa la ta2to nesa2ekom men doborehenn…ya3ni don’t have anal sex…so clear…we don’t wanna let someone who don’t know that much to go ahead and do it to his wife and say..oh i heard qwider say it’s ok as long as u like it dear and so they’d end up both partying haram because of u dear…no offense tab3an i know u’d understand.and by the way, lutti ( ahl lutt) that allah cursed them and punished them good preferred men than women…ya3ni male male sex…ya3ni gay….mesh anal with women…Please writer, try some research because misleading someone unintentionally would do much harm than you’d ever imagine.

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  17. والله يا هانى دورت ولقيت الآية دى وكمان حديث اما الآية التانية مش عارفة الاقيها انى للاسف مش حافظة القرآن تماماً وربنا يسامحنى بقى لو كنت غلطت :قال الله عز وجل: (فإذا تطهرن فأتوهن من حيث أمركم الله إن الله يحب التوابين ويحب المتطهرين)أيضاً، روى خزيمة بن ثابت رضي الله عنه قال: (قال رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم: ملعون من أتى امرأة في دبرها).

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  18. Qwaider, it is important because if you utter a word and you don’t know what it mean, its better that you don’t say it to start with. Throwing words without knowing (or agreeing on) what they mean is well…… stupid!!!As I always say, we can always make our own dictionaries. Heck I think homosexuals should refer to homosexual sex as “straight sex” – But won’t that just be confusing?! Why make our own definitions if there are dictionaries that people can refer to?!First, the link you gave is NOT a dictionary. Its a list of legal terms, and legal terms don’t always match the real meanings of words. They are ad-hoc to their purpose in the laws of that country. Numerous dictionaries agree as I stated before: Webster, Babylon, dictonary.com, even < HREF="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sodomy" REL="nofollow">wikipedia<>.< HREF="http://www.gaylib.com/text/clas12.htm" REL="nofollow">This <> is the first website that shows when you search “< HREF="http://www.google.com/search?q=what+is+sodomy&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a" REL="nofollow">what is sodomy<>” on google.<>There are others, but can you bring me one source that says Liwat is anything but male on male?<> – Ok, my argument is about Sodomy as an english word. As I said earlier: <>Qwaider, it depends on what you consider “Luti” to mean. Luti is commonly associated with “Kawm Lute” who are known for Sodomy. Assuming this line of thought, you are wrong.<> – Ok, so I thought maybe in Arabic Luti has a different meaning, so I got an Arabic-Arabic dictionary (“Al-Munjed”, which I believe is a reputable Arabic-Arabic dictionary) and looked up the word “Lute”, Lam/Waw/6ah and the definition I found has nothing at all to do with any kind of sex!! Aparently “Lute” in arabic means a “sticky thing”!! I am not good at arabic, maybe someone can hint me how can I find this word in the Arabic-Arabic dictionary!And, The Arab Observer: Sodomy is not only anal… Oral sex is too considered sodomy!! I have to admit it, I didn’t know that oral sex is considered sodomy until today, but I did one good thing: I got that fixed! Maybe you will find it odd, but I look up in the dictionary many words before I use them in my blogging. Maybe I am taking it a bit far, but thats the most academically correct way to do it!

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  19. why do ppl ruin a good joke about nabawilseh ? hehe … the fact that some consider it racist is funny … and then anal sex is legal … yee this is really comments gone wild. just thought since we are playing the definition game … sexual orientation is a post psychology construct … so to this day it really doesn’t exist in the Arab world … so using that word is out of place … it always refered to the act rather than attraction… as for the interesting thing about why nabawilseh have that label is not because of attraction as far as i understand, its more of that they are so horny that they would just “do it” with anything…i wish i can fit in another three dots … 😛

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  20. well as qwaider said, there are 3 discussions going on and since we are all a3deen binkhabes..I wanna penetrate this post anally and discuss a 4th topic, which is the woman in the joke.You can clearly see that this joke is very demoralizing to women especially since it attacks their intellectual and commone sense. It shows you how stupid she is that she didn’t know the difference of turning around. Or maybe she didn’t have enough sex education.I am really disappointed in you ya “observer” for picking such a stereotyping joke, especially from a person who claims to support women rights.

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  21. Bambam, exactly how many nabulsis do you know ? even if it’s 5, how can you call over 134,000 people (not counting those outside Nablus) horny based on those 5 ? I find the joke both offensive, not funny, and in very poor taste, but Fadi already explained he was simply trying to interpret the joke. The simplest way to consider why it is offensive is to put yourself in the victim’s place. Replace Nabulsi in the post title and the joke with wherever you come from, and see if you find it funny.

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  22. Hani, its not offensive unless you want it to be offensive. I know some Nabulsi guys and they always joke about being homosexuals… Even the first day I met them, they started the conversation by telling me: <>“Watch out dude, we are Nawabelsiyeh… Deer balak 3la 6eezak!”<> – They know what they are stereotyped and they take advantage of it!! The biggest surprise of it all: They are not actually homosexuals (at least not all of them)!!

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  23. Rasha, lut’s people didnt only had same sex, they also made many other sins.Lewat in the arabic language is anal sex, and as DM now found it is oral sex as well. It is not uncommon to find in old arabic books describing sexual acts that a man ‘lat’ with his wife.DM, thanks for searching the definition. I just skipped the oral part first run 🙂Hamza, I didnt pick this joke to make you laugh! I am trying to clear things up here and make some distinction between things. I dont find this joke funny in the first place.

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  24. Great post and interesting comment thread. For Arabs to discuss sodomy/homosexuality without calling for the <>sinners<> to hang from cranes is a monumental achievement in itself. As a Palestinian traveler of the Hershey Highway, I have my two groosh to add here. 1-Qudsiyeen (Jerusalemites) are much more anally active than Nabulsis. This isn’t to say that they’re wired differently, but rather because they have access to West Jerusalem’s gay infrastructure, including non-gay infrastructure such as public parks where they loiter and hook up away from the eyes of the Sulta/7amas. 2-The Observer said <>“for most arabs it is the sexual act itself that matters. If a man prefers anal sex, then it doen’t matter what is the sex of the receptive end. “<> What you describe above is changing fast, especially in urban settings. With the emergence of an imported “gay identity”, most Arab men no longer view it as an act in itself. They certainly do not want to engage in something that will label them in any way, even if they are on the “giving” end. Up until the early 90’s, things were quite different. 3-As for Babylon’s dictionary including oral sex under the sodomy umbrella. That is quite an anomaly, the more conventional definition of sodomy always involves anal penetration regardless of the receiving partner’s gender. Otherwise, all wives performing oral sex on their husbands are sodomites. That would be silly.4-Anonymous 1, for the joke to be racist, Nabulsis have to be their own race. While Nabulsis tend to invariably have a large bushy mono-brow, that is hardly a unique race identifier. (especially in our region).

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  25. Nizo, I respectfully disagree on your definition of racism.This doesn’t necessary refer to an ethnic race, but can also be applied to the people of a specific geographic location since they share common attributes, and will often intermarry to those close to them so the attributes can persist.eg. you can be racist against Americans eventhough Americans consist of a multitude of ethnicities.Regardless whether you agree on the definition of the word, a joke discriminating based on geography is as bad as a joke discriminating based on ethnicity. I guess because this particular joke deals with sex, it can seem particularily offensive.

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  26. Whether a comment/joke is racist/discriminatory depends on three elements:1-source2-context3-intentTake the following Bandora vs. Banadoora examples:A-I just came back from my best friend’s birthday party. She happens to be Lebanese Maronite and so was everyone at our table except for myself (I’m Palestinian-Room). When I said pass the Kobbeh, you can only imagine the fun they had at my expense. The Lebanese pronounce it Kibbeh. Then they made fun of my Bandora (vs. their Banadoora). Not to be outdone, I hit back at their Lebanese-French Kasskasseh and the way they would eat a cockroach if someone told them it came from Paris. Her aunt was laughing so hard at the cockroach joke her breast accidentally popped out from the confines of her low-cut blouse. It was a wonderfully memorable evening and naturally no offense was taken because none of us are anal retentive.B-Turn the clock back to over 30 years ago when my uncle, a student at the AUB went missing while on his way home to our Dbayeh camp. Story goes that he was stopped by a Phalange (Kataeb) roadblock and was instantly identified by his Palestinian accent. Those days, on a certain bridge called Jisr el Mawt, the Phalange would show you a tomato and ask you what it is. If you said Bandora, they would throw you off the bridge. My uncle suffered an even worse fate. A week after his disappearance, a kind-hearted Phalange informed my grandfather to grab a bag and collect his son’s body. It layed there in a mound of small kabab-sized pieces with his head on top.—The bandora comment appears in both examples. In the first, the source is my best friend’s family, the context is a party, and the intent is merely to tease rather than torment. In the second example, the source is a Phalange roadblock , the context is a war and the intent is to kill. Going back to this evening, I could have feigned offense at the bandora joke, especially given its personal significance to me and my family. Instead I rolled with the punches and had me a little fun. Again, I thought of <>source, context, and intent<>. The same goes for the Nabulsi joke, no one intends to hurt Nabulsis and I doubt a Hebronite father (known to be overly serious and without humour) would refuse a Nabulsi son-in-law because of a silly stereotype that Nabulsis themselves joke about. Life is too short for us to become Political Correctness Mutawa’een, let’s ease up on our sphincters a little…

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  27. Absolutely, context and intent are critical, but subject to interpretation, but i find all too often that people quote these excuses when it’s someone else’s race or minority being made fun of.

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  28. Hani, you and others are given free reign to make fun of Akkawis to your hearts’ delight. Unless the intent is to maim or kill me, you can fire away at will and I will laugh with you. 🙂

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  29. Nizo, itafaqna. (researching akkawis)!You in turn have diplomatic immunity to make fun of Khalilis (knocks on head making hollow noise), and Nabulsis (just leave the knafeh alone) 😀

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  30. just to make things clear for the writer of this post, you said homosexuals have anal sex, well,, its not 100% true… not all homosexuals have anal sex (top or bottom), some homosexual physical relationships do not include anal penetration, yes, it’s very common but its not the only way two gay males express their sexuality, some couples have sex without anal penetration. I hope i gave u an inside glimpse on the homosexual world.PS. I loved the word “attraction” in this sentence:“homosexuality: sexual attraction to members of the same sex”

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  31. Hey observer,today i came here to ask you a favour my friend.. A few days ago there was this guy to came to Paulo’s website all distraught, and lost and wanting to commit suicide.. You can go check it out, look under the news link and go to the st joseph’s party update2 comments. The thing is, i’ve experienced what it feels like to lose someone you love to suicide and i cannot begin to tell you what it feels like, which is all the more reason i don’t want him to do anything stupid. The thing is, he seems to be most spiritually confused which lead him to lose all hope, especially being muslim, and realising that he doesn’t believe in islam. I went to his link to try talk to him but everything is in arabic which i completely don’t understand. I know its alot to ask- but maybe you can go and leave a somewhat hopeful comment there, asking him to get some help and even offering him to talk to me- give him the link to my blog. Tell him to talk to a friend or even talk on paulo’s website and we can all discuss our beliefs and learn together. Just ask him to try and to live to discover what he believes and who he is. I thought he’d understand better if it was in arabic thats why i came to you, and that maybe because you challenge certain aspects of your religion, he can have some faith that he can too. Besides that.. I had no idea where to even write a comment. I’m sorry to disturb but you know, suicide is so unnecessary, its such a waste, and the pain a family goes through, is just too much i cannot begin to tell you. Thats why i want to know that i tried my best to prevent it if i can. Thank you so much for your assistance, its greatly appreciated my friend. Do keep me posted.Lots of loveYajna

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  32. Anonymouse, you are right. I agree.Yajna, I visited the guy’s blog. He doesnt seem to be arabic. It was a weird text right there, I guess maybe it is Iranian. I tried to give him some comfort and told him to contact either you and me if he needs any help. You are an angel 🙂

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  33. this post was just hillarious! the joke is lame in every way, but i a so proud we actually discussed this without anyone (not even rasha) calling for a witch hunt to kill all homosexuals/sodomites.Gay rights maybe something very dsitant, However, i am just shocked how women can quote the qura’an when talking about rights in bed. the “ayat” do not make any kind of reference to the female party except as a receiving, mindless, rightless body. no wonder the joke carries on with the 1400 year old tradition.But overal a great post…. ppl always love talking about sex.

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