Veronika Decides to Die: Love above Wisdom

One of the passages that stopped me in Veronika Decides to Die is the explanation Edwardo came with about the painting of The Lady (Virgin Mary) standing poised above the world, with her hands outstreched to the Earth and with rays of light streaming from her fingertips while standing on a live snake.

His explanation:

The Virgin equals female energy and is the mistress of the snake, which signifies wisdom. Love is above wisdom, just as the Virgin is above the snake. For her, everything is Inspiration. She doesn’t bother judging what is Good and what Evil.

Love is above wisdom

This sentence says it all.

Looking back to last week’s heated debate about homosexuality, and seeing people fighting each other on what is good and what is bad, then reading this sentence which stopped me and made me realize that it doesn’t really matter. No one knows what is good and what is bad, what really matters is love, because Love is above all..

Veronika decides to die: Miracle of life

In a second, Eduard remembered everything that had happened the previous night. There was a woman lying curled in his arms.

‘She… she’s dead.’
But the woman moved and opened her eyes.
‘What’s going on?’ asked Veronika.
‘Nothing,’ said Eduard, helping her to her feet. ‘Or rather, a miracle happened: another day of life.’

I finally finished this amazing novel of Paulo’s Coelho. I personally think that this one is his best ever. It kept me hooked till the ending. It gave me a new perspective on who we call *Mad* people. It made me more interesting in psychology, and it gave me a better insight on how important our brains are, and how a simple distortion in our brain chemicals would affect a great deal of our life.

When I reached to the above versus. I was expecting Veronika to be dead. When she opened her eyes. I was glad that she was granted another day of life. I was reading this page in the early morning, yesterday in bed. When I reached the line of a miracle, another day of life. I opened my eyes and took a deep breath. I looked at the window, and suddenly, a the dimmed clouded weather turned brighter. A light just filled the room for seconds. It reminded me that I am granted a miracle as well. Another day of life gift…

American Psychological Association: Homosexuality

Some people refuse to see the sun even when its rays hurts their faces.

I know that many refuse to hear science when it conflicts with their own set of beliefs. Like in religion, people take a selective approach in believing what they want to belive.

I will do what I have to do and end the homosexuality series posts with scientific point of you. Hope that all, who beleive in science, and those who dont, go and read the article.

I picked the American Psychological Association (APA):

About APA
Based in Washington, DC, the American Psychological Association (APA) is a scientific and professional organization that represents psychology in the United States. With 150,000 members, APA is the largest association of psychologists worldwide.

Here is their stand on homosexuality:

I quote:

Is Sexual Orientation a Choice?

No, human beings can not choose to be either gay or straight. Sexual orientation emerges for most people in early adolescence without any prior sexual experience. Although we can choose whether to act on our feelings, psychologists do not consider sexual orientation to be a conscious choice that can be voluntarily changed.

Can Therapy Change Sexual Orientation?

No. Even though most homosexuals live successful, happy lives, some homosexual or bisexual people may seek to change their sexual orientation through therapy, sometimes pressured by the influence of family members or religious groups to try and do so. The reality is that homosexuality is not an illness. It does not require treatment and is not changeable.

However, not all gay, lesbian, and bisexual people who seek assistance from a mental health professional want to change their sexual orientation. Gay, lesbian, and bisexual people may seek psychological help with the coming out process or for strategies to deal with prejudice, but most go into therapy for the same reasons and life issues that bring straight people to mental health professionals

Freedom Quote

Those who deny freedom to others deserve it not for themselves.

Abraham Lincoln

After all the heated debate about homosexuality in the past few days, I wake up to read this quotation of the day on my blog. I guess Abraham Lincoln said it all. I have no comment.


Gays and Marriage

Yesterday I addressed Gays and Femininity in a post where I argued that Gay men are not necessarily femininie and Gay women are not necessarily masculine which has and still been helping them in staying covered from the outward society.

A comment by Mohammad stopped me, and remind me of my social pressure short story that I have posted several months ago.

He said:

because now they live 2 life’s one with there wife’s & the other secret life with there gay lovers
they can’t suppress there emotions forever even after they got children!!

Gays and Marriage
I think that there is a misconception about gay marriage around the world. People think that gay marriage would destroy the secrecy of marriage that has been created to be a form of union between a man and a woman.

Now, if those gay are asking to have a religious marriage then yes, people would have a point, but what they are really asking for is some kind of a civil union that give them the rights of any other couple who decides to build a life with each other.

Why marriage is important to them as long as they can live togather as long as they want?

It is because there are many legal issues that should be addressed when 2 people decide to share a life togather. Imagine the hectic of a hetreo-couple seperation in court where everything is legal and documented and compare it to a homo-couple where there is nothing legal to protect the right of each party when getting a seperation.

In the other hand, and looking at it in our society where gay people fear even to declare out their sexuality, and do have a big pressure from society to get married.

Most end up married to the opposite sex.

Isn’t that what we are asking them to do? We think that this is a good solution because it is haram to be gay, and in this way, they would turn into straights! But in fact, sexual orientation cannot be changed. As Mohammad said, most married gay end up cheating on their wives with other men. Gay women are in no better situation, they end up married as well to other men and can easily cheat them with other women as well.

This should be a serious warning to our society.

No one is immune to this. No matter how smart you are, you may end up marrying a gay man/woman. It has been happening for ages, and is still happening today, and will keep on happening till we gave those homosexual the safety to come out from their shells and live safely among us.

Gays and Femininity

After posting yesterday about The first Gay Jordan blog, I got several messages where some felt for the guy, some didn’t, and some even attack homosexuals as whole.

One comment by Tala stopped me, she said:

imagine a head of an arab political party who is gay! it is possible but not credible, i wont have faith in his leadership, its like pedophile pope,, a gay doesnt qualify by the laws of arab culture!! ma 3am tinbale3! the first thing that occurs to me is “biddak shad baraghee ya 7ilu”

It triggered me to write more about this subject in an attempt to raise more awarnace towards this issue that is starting to reveal itself more than anytime in our Arabic history. There are many aspects regarding the whole homosexual thing that I would like to address in several posts.

Gays and Femininity

There is a strong stereotype among people where they percieve feminine men as gays while in fact there are many gay men who are as musculine as any other straight man, and where there are man feminine men who are straight.

Femininity is a relative matter, and in the contrary of what a lot of people believe, it has nothing to do with someone’s sexual orientation. It does have a strong relationship with the sexual identity of the person which is different than sexual orientation.

We tend to put everything different in the same basket. We don’t differenciate between a man having sexual attraction to another man, and a man who feels like a woman from the inside, or a man who has neither this nor that and still likes to wear the other gender clothes (cross dressers).

Sexual orientation, sexual identity, and sex are three different conceptsand are not a set of 2 or 3 distinct options. For example it isn’t either Gay, Bi, or Straight in terms of orientation, or Male, Female, in between in terms of sexual identity, or Man, Woman or both in terms of sex.

All of those factors comes in a spectrum. Some studies claims that 90% of the population are in fact Bi-sexuals. The strength of attraction to certain gender varies from a person to another. It depends on how strong are those urges in order to someone to act on them. We, people, are different. We usually scale on ourselves in order to judge the other. We try to acknowledge our differences, but we find a hard time doing so.

I am not sure what is exactly that we hate to see. A man who has an attraction to other men, or a man who looks and acts as a femininie man? Is a gay masculine man accepted in our society? Is a straight femininie man accepted?

Is it a matter of sexual orientation or a matter of sexual roles?

Or is it a matter of us not accepting anything that look different than what percieve to be the norm?

First Gay Jordanian blog

Jordanian gays find the internet as their only means of communicating their internal feelings to the outer society of Jordan that percieve them as immoral people.

I came across this interesting blog for a Jordanian guy from Irbid who is trying to explain out his struggle of his homosexual feelings through his blog.

He said:

بكل بساطة لأنها وسيلة التعبير الوحيدة المتاحة لي لكي أعبر عن مشاعري المكبوتة منذ أكثر من إثنى عشر عاما نعم لقد كبت مشاعري في داخلي وخجلت منها لأني مثلي الجنس مضطهد من قبل معظم أفراد مجتمعي لدرجة أني وصلت إلى مرحلة قريبة من الانفجار بسبب عدم قدرتي على التوفيق بين توجهاتي الجنسية وديني الذي كنت ملتزما به ولكن الحمد لله الآن أنا متقبل بشكل كامل لمثليتي وفخور بها ولكن أحب أن أكون واضحا منذ البداية لا أريد من أعزائي قراء هذه المدونة أن يعتقدوا أن الهدف منها هو نشر المثلية بالمجتمع بالعكس تماما فأنا لا أطلب من أي إنسان أن يتحول إلى مثلي الجنس ولكن عزيزي/عزيزتي قارئة هذه المدونة إذا كنت مثلي الجنس أرجو أن تتقبل ذاتك وتتصالح مع نفسك فنحن لم نختر بأيدينا أن نكون مثليين هكذا خلقنا وهذا هو قدرنا ونحن بكل سعادة فخورين باختلافنا بالتوجهات الجنسية عن الآخرين ونرجو من مجتمعنا الحبيب أن يتقبلنا كما نحن بدون اضطهاد ولا داعي لكي نخفي رؤوسنا تحت التراب فنحن موجودون في كل المجتمعات وعلى مر العصور لن ننقرض ولن نختفي من الوجود وسنبقى نناضل في هذه الحياة حتى يتم قبولنا ونحصل على حقوقنا الكاملة التي سبقنا إليها الكثير من المثليين في الدول المتقدمة التي تحترم حقوق الإنسان المقدسة ومنها الحق في حرية التعبير الذي أمارسه هنا في هذه المدونة الجديدة وكما قال فولتير أنا لست مقتنعاً بشيء مما تقوله لكني سأدافع حتى الموت عن حقك في أن تقول

I wonder how this cry out of a sincere voice would affect the homophobic society of Jordan.

Here is the blogger’s URL: