The moment of being alive


Last Thursday, I got back home around 12:30 PM at night. I wore my pajammas and went to bed. I grabbed “The Piligrimage” book of Paulo Coelho next to my bed and opened it to the page where stopped last time.

I was so tired after a long day. I could barely comprehend the wisdom in Paulo’s words. In fact, I could barely see the lines I was reading. My eyes fall on my hand, my finger that were holding the book. I noticed my skin. I noticed the way I am grabbing the book.

I stopped for a moment. I realized that I am still alive. I realized that I have been rushing around since I woke up that day. I do so every day. Worrying about everything in life where I don’t find the time to stop, to feel my breath, and enjoy being alive.

I worry when to wake up in order to have enough time to have my breakfast before work so that to do the right thing for my body. I rush into the bathroom. I rush to dress my cloths, and rush to reach to work at the right time.

At work, I rush to check my emails. To chech my blog. To check what tasks I have for the day. I have to check on my email buddies from time to time. I have to read others blogs from time to time to keep myself updated and enjoy others writings. I have to sign in MSN in order to chat with my other friends.

like everyone else, I have to manage my social contacts. I have to manage my body needs. I have to manage my brain needs. And I have to manage my income and allowance needs.

While I do enjoy it sometimes doing all of that. Like taking a shower. Going to the gym to keep my body fit. Eating the right food. Talking to a friend. Exchanging ideas with someone. Reading. Writing. Painting. Watching Tv. Working.

That night, I felt that need to stop it all. For few moments. I just wanted to look around me. Move my eyes around the room. Looking at the window of my room. The curtains. The walls. I wanted to feel my eyes taking the shots. I wanted to feel the air coming into my lungs. I wanted to drink some water to feel it running through my mouth. I wanted to stop the auto-pilot that has been running me throughout the day and feel my life.

Unfortunatly I was so tired. My brain cells were too exhausted. I felt them sleeping. I was sure some of them were already asleep. The others were falling in turn. I couldn’t enjoy my moment. I had to obey my body needs once again.

I put my book aside. I closed my eyes. And I slept.

Without enjoying my moment – the moment of being alive.

7 thoughts on “The moment of being alive

  1. Anonymous says:

    It’s awesome how your spirit chimes in to let you know it needs some nurturing! I love the feeling of drinking water and actually taking the time out to feel the water take its journey into my body down into the complex yet simple to God mechanism human body.

    It’s great when you are driving and you take the time out to realize the trees blowing in the wind, the wind blowing through your hair. The other people passing you in their car on the way to work, and realize they are also a magnificent creation of God. I love when I wake up out of my autopilot mode to be in the moment to live in the moment and to give thanks for the moment.

    Be blessed Observer in everything you do

    Love, peace, and light.

    Marie

    The Pilgrimage is an awesome book. I am currently preparing myself mentally and physically for the journey this spring time.

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  2. Kizni, I don’t usually think of the greatness of God. In many times, I am not a believer, in others, I feel the love. I feel loved and protected. I feel love to everything around me. Maybe at times I become a spiritual believer. I don’t know. I just like when I feel at peace.

    Marie, God bless you too. I do the same🙂. I mean while driving to work in the morning. I look around me at people. I enjoy the rising sun. The clouds in the sky. The music from the radio. It makes you feel that you are alive. That you are facing a new day. Unfortunatly those moments are scarce.

    I am enjoying reading The Pilgrimage so much. I think it is the best on of Peolo that I read so far.

    I am just a bit confused. Does what he prescribe in the book is real? I mean that I like the wisdom in his words, but I am not sure about the practices. I am not much believer. Sometimes I don’t even believe in spirits. I would love to get a proof.

    Good luck in your journey. Please keep us posted of your progress when you take on it. Write it on your blog🙂

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  3. Anonymous says:

    i participated in an online interview with Paulo last year around august can’t remember exactly when— have to look back in my diary. and i listened to his answers to his questions. Read the Valkyries (personal and intimate book he wrote true story) when you get the chance. Paulo is very spiritual, i sent the Pilgrimage to my father who is a Mason, he told me that Paulo is also apart of an sacred spiritual group and yes it is real (the book) many people read his book and look at it as plain fiction, his book is filled with wisdom and what is wisdom?????

    go to his web site and go to WALKIG THE PATH… Interesting… what you have to realize you are a spirit so how can you not be spiritual???

    thank you for the encouragement!

    marie
    Brightlight warrior Nika

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  4. take a week-end, far from everything(not anyone;)), some place where u could find a green color spreaded all over the road:)(Ajloun maybe),just take a walk, spend enough time n enjoy the peaceful environment, meditate, and comeback full of life again;) mwa. and don’t forget to ask me to go with u:)lol.

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  5. I read the Valkries as well. I didn’t understand it much. It talks much abuot magic. I didn’t like it.

    So this journey of Paulo is for real. It is good to know that.

    I am not sure whether we really have a spirit or it is all just biology. That is what I meant.

    I will go to his site and read Walking the Path.

    Thanks…

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