Have I grown up or gone astray?


When I was young, the priest who taught me religion at school used to warn us of the devil who is capable of leading us away from God in a very cunny way. My muslim friends where taught by their muslim teacher that the devil can whisper in their ears with bad stuff. We all used to pray for God to keep the devil away.

Some parents and grown ups found a way to use the fear of the devil as a mean to help them in controlling their kids. For instance, when some food fall in the ground, they used to say the devil licked it so that kids wont pick it up and eat it. It was easier to convince us not to eat it because it has became evil rather than because it became dirty.

At nights, I used, like many kids, fear going to bed by my own cause the devil might just appear to me. The priest claimed that making the cross sign would help scare him off. The cross became my sense of security for a long time till I get it off my neck two years ago.

A belief system has been implanted in me, as in other kids as well. We were only Muslims and Christians in class room. Even in our ally, it has been the same. I used to think that we only have two systems. Christianity and Islam, we are right, they are wrong.

As I grew up, I became to aknowledge the similarities between the two religion. I became to realize that our universe is full of different belief systems. There is Jews, Hindus, Buddhism, Agnostics, Atheists,..etc.

Why would my belief system be the right one? Have I been lucky to be taught the right thing while others are misfortunate? My poor friends who dont believe in what I believe, do they have to end up in Hell?

I start questioning my relgion, as well as other religions. People like to argue, and they like to point out what is illogical in the way others think. It didnt help much in making me jump to their faith, but it helped for me questioning mine. I kept my questioning to theirs as well.

When you start questioning something in a system, with time, it makes you question the whole system. A normal reaction would be fear, stop thinking, close your mind and stick to what makes you feel safe. But life doesnt just go this way. Information keep on hitting you in the face. Use your brain. It keeps working by itself anyway.

I came to a point where I can tell that nothing is certain in this life. Even scientific facts is being altered, changed, and argued upon. Would I toss a coin and decide to follow a certain God? Or keep my mind working leading me to riskey places where I fear much of a Godless univers?

A delimma most humans have endures at some point of their lives. Am I being tested as religious people would say? or have I grown up and learnt new facts of life?

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